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You caught me, I tried to fuck your sheep

Boss Hog

TRIBE Member
Fire Chief Caught On The Lamb
Arizona man, 52, found with pants down in neighbor's barn

MARCH 7--If our mail is any indication, many of you are very interested in the case of the Arizona man who was arrested this weekend after being found in a neighbor's barn with his pants down and a gray lamb at his side. Leroy Johnson, a deputy chief with the Mesa Fire Department, was nabbed shortly after the neighbor's teenage daughter watched him drag the animal into the family barn Saturday afternoon. When later confronted, the 52-year-old Johnson, who apparently had been drinking, told the neighbor (who has the improbable name of Alan Goats), "You caught me Alan, I tried to fuck your sheep." We'll let you explore all the gory details yourself, via a (too) detailed Maricopa County Sheriff's Office report. Johnson, seen at right in a booking photo, was charged with trespassing, disorderly conduct, and public sexual indecency. Along with releasing its report on the incident, the sheriff's office provided TSG with evidence photos of the poor lamb--who is pictured below--and the alleged scene of the crime. We'll excuse ourselves now. We have to shower.

http://www.thesmokinggun.com/archive/0307062sheep1.html

0307062inside1.jpg


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0307062sheep1.jpg
 
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Ditto Much

TRIBE Member
Chef: Hello there, children!
Children: Hey, Chef
Stan: Chef, what's a prostitute?
Chef:Dag-nabbit children! How come every time you come in here
you gotta be askin' me questons that I shouldn't be answering?!
"Chef, what's the clitoris?" "What's a lesbian, Chef?" "How come they
call it a rim jub, Chef?" For once, can't just come in here and say,
"Hi Chef. Nice day, isn't it?"
Stan: Hi Chef. Nice day, isn't it?
Chef: It sure is! Thank you.
Stan: Chef, what's a prostitute?
Chef: Uh uh! You children are gonna get me in trouble with the principal again.
Cartman: Lunchtime! I'm starved!
Chef: Oh my God. Eric?
Cartman: That's me.
Stan: Chef was just about to tell us what a protitute is.
Chef: Why do you need to know what a prostitue is anyway?!
Stan: Because Jesus told us that Kenny's a prostitute. Is he?
Kenny: Yeah. Am I?
Chef: Well, no, uh of course Kenny is not a prostitute.
Kyle: Why?
Chef: Well, because, children, a prostitute is someone who…
you could pay for certain services.
Stan: Like what?
Chef: Like keeping you company. Understand?
Stan: No.
Chef: You see, chidren, sometimes a man needs to be with a woman.
But sometimes, when the lovin' is over, the woman just wants to talk and talk
and talk and talk.

[song]
But a prostitute is someone who would love you
No matter who you are, or what you look like.
Yes, it's true, children.
That's not why you pay a prostitute,
No, you don't pay her to stay, you pay her to leave afterwards.
That's why I pays a lot for prostitutes! Ladies and Gentlemen, Mr. James Taylor.

James Taylor: A prostitute is like any other woman
They all trade somethin' for sex and they do it well.
Chef: And that's why I say-
Chef and James Taylor: Prostitutes! Prostitutes! They-
Chef: Oohhhh [sees principal]
James Taylor, what the hell are you doin' in here?!
Singing' about prostitutes to the children! Get out of here!










See folks if this guy could have just hired a prostitute this poor goat would never have been violated.
 
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littlejon

TRIBE Member
so..
you can buy a porn pass for $20 a month, or fileshare.
you can go for a rub & tug for $30.
call-people range from $50 to $250 depending on if it is a quick little nosh or some professional ba-donk-a-donk.


now i suppose petting zoos are about $5, plus some quarters for feed.
but just how embarrased are you when you get caught fucking a sheep?
 

Bass-Invader

TRIBE Member
I always wonder if these people are actually specifically turned on by sheep, or just really desperate for pussy - any pussy.
 
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Aerius Zension

TRIBE Member
Ditto Much said:
Chef: Hello there, children!
Children: Hey, Chef
Stan: Chef, what's a prostitute?
Chef:Dag-nabbit children! How come every time you come in here
you gotta be askin' me questons that I shouldn't be answering?!
"Chef, what's the clitoris?" "What's a lesbian, Chef?" "How come they
call it a rim jub, Chef?" For once, can't just come in here and say,
"Hi Chef. Nice day, isn't it?"
Stan: Hi Chef. Nice day, isn't it?
Chef: It sure is! Thank you.
Stan: Chef, what's a prostitute?
Chef: Uh uh! You children are gonna get me in trouble with the principal again.
Cartman: Lunchtime! I'm starved!
Chef: Oh my God. Eric?
Cartman: That's me.
Stan: Chef was just about to tell us what a protitute is.
Chef: Why do you need to know what a prostitue is anyway?!
Stan: Because Jesus told us that Kenny's a prostitute. Is he?
Kenny: Yeah. Am I?
Chef: Well, no, uh of course Kenny is not a prostitute.
Kyle: Why?
Chef: Well, because, children, a prostitute is someone who…
you could pay for certain services.
Stan: Like what?
Chef: Like keeping you company. Understand?
Stan: No.
Chef: You see, chidren, sometimes a man needs to be with a woman.
But sometimes, when the lovin' is over, the woman just wants to talk and talk
and talk and talk.

[song]
But a prostitute is someone who would love you
No matter who you are, or what you look like.
Yes, it's true, children.
That's not why you pay a prostitute,
No, you don't pay her to stay, you pay her to leave afterwards.
That's why I pays a lot for prostitutes! Ladies and Gentlemen, Mr. James Taylor.

James Taylor: A prostitute is like any other woman
They all trade somethin' for sex and they do it well.
Chef: And that's why I say-
Chef and James Taylor: Prostitutes! Prostitutes! They-
Chef: Oohhhh [sees principal]
James Taylor, what the hell are you doin' in here?!
Singing' about prostitutes to the children! Get out of here!










See folks if this guy could have just hired a prostitute this poor goat would never have been violated.


Is that the episode where they hire the prostitute to cough on everything?
 

Ditto Much

TRIBE Member
Aerius Zension said:
Is that the episode where they hire the prostitute to cough on everything?


No that was the chicken pox episode. This one is the one where Kenny gets aressted for giving Howard Stern a hummer and they have to get another kid to crawl into the bus drivers womb so they pick the junky thats pretending to be the skinny eric cartman while cartman is busy at fat camp selling candy to fat kids.


hmmm I may have waisted my life.
 
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