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Workplace washroom etiquette.

Discussion in 'TRIBE Main Forum' started by Beings, Sep 21, 2010.

  1. Beings

    Beings TRIBE Member

    Fellas, let's have this settled once and for all.

    If you are standing next to me at the urinal, a bit of chit chat is OK.

    If you are sitting in a stall taking a dump, do not strike conversations with your stall neighbors.
    ESPECIALLY, do not say "Hey, who's there?".

    Squeezing one out is a very intimate procedure, so please do not talk to others, unless you know for a fact the other person is your SCAT buddy.
  2. diablo

    diablo TRIBE Member

    What in the fuck...?

  3. Silvershadow

    Silvershadow TRIBE Member

    I was gonna say... I'm not a dude, but I was under the impression that urinal chit chat is a big no-no.
  4. Wiseman

    Wiseman TRIBE Member

    Don't fucking talk to me in the washroom.
  5. acheron

    acheron TRIBE Member

    My first instinct when someone starts a conversation with me is to turn and face them.


    It's the polite thing to do.
  6. Beings

    Beings TRIBE Member

    With strangers, a big no no. At work where guys know each-other, a "hey whats up" can be ok-ish.
  7. praktik

    praktik TRIBE Member

    Yes it is - so please, let's ban all the micro-penises from standing up to pee in a CUBICLE!!

    #1: they get pee on the seats for people who need to shit
    #2: they usually pick the stall right next to mine for their urination - and I don't like how my privacy in this "intimate" moment is being troubled just cause some guy is ashamed of his junk.
    #3: there's a row of urinals - USE EM!
  8. [- FuNKtiOn -]

    [- FuNKtiOn -] TRIBE Member

    although I'll accept small talk at the sinks while washing.
  9. xtcfreak

    xtcfreak TRIBE Member

    More than two shakes is a jerk - save it for home!

  10. Liability

    Liability TRIBE Member

    The only time I break this rule is if there is no space at the urinals or another gentleman has not followed common urinal courtesy.

    At my work, we have three urinals with no dividers. They are a pretty tight squeeze and we have two individuals who insist on using the middle urinal even when no one else is there.

    In this case, rather than rub elbows, I will use a stall to piss but I do raise the seat.

    Another question for the men or women, what do you think those paper ass gaskets really do? If it is just for peace of mind fine, but please remove after usage.
  11. acheron

    acheron TRIBE Member

    I wish the asians in my office would use the paper thingys when they stand on the seat to squat. Nothing better than footprints on the toilet seat.
  12. KillaLadY

    KillaLadY TRIBE Member

    So do you guys check eachother's penises when you pee?
  13. Sal De Ban

    Sal De Ban TRIBE Member

    i work with some awesomely hilarious folks. here's something from today you'll appreciate:

    him (standing and pissing at the urinal): so what did you get up to on the weekend?

    me (at the sink about 10 feet away, adjacent the urinals): uh...not much, cottage-

    him: jesus man! don't talk to me while i'm takin a piss!

    yeah he got me. i'm gonna use that one too.
  14. rawd

    rawd TRIBE Member

    Pissing all over mall toilet seats since 1992
  15. Sal De Ban

    Sal De Ban TRIBE Member

    that's why i ALWAYS upper-deck in mall bathrooms
  16. solacevip

    solacevip TRIBE Promoter

    What I don't understand.......for all the years I've been alive. This goes back to the manscaping and getting "organized".

    Why THE FUCK are so many dudes balding and shedding at the urinal? Every men's toilet and urinal is covered with pubes. Like rub some Rogaine on your crotch and stop shedding all over the place. Or get some clippers and trim the twig and berry patch, man?

    Not only do some of these fuckers miss the toilet seat, they decide to turn it into a Chia Pet.

  17. Thunder

    Thunder TRIBE Member

    this is all kinds of awesome.
  18. KickIT

    KickIT TRIBE Member

    Do you guys wipe when someone else is in the can or wait til they're gone?
  19. acheron

    acheron TRIBE Member

    wiping's probably the quietest thing you can do in there so sure, why not. that said I have been known to sit there for a while waiting for the decks to clear before I let a major bombing run.
  20. diablo

    diablo TRIBE Member

    That is pretty off-putting.
  21. Persephone

    Persephone TRIBE Member

    Rule #1: if you're going to drop a load, use the "family" bathroom (if available).
    Rule #2: Practice the courtesy flush, ffs.
  22. Wiseman

    Wiseman TRIBE Member

    Uh, no.
  23. pig-pen

    pig-pen TRIBE Member

    I can’t stand sharing the workplace shitter. So I found a quieter handicapped washroom that fewer people use, and that has given me some precious privacy for my pooping. And I protect it jealously.

    Whenever others come around, I make as much rude noise as possible, as much stink as possible, and make generally a big production of everything I do in that shitter so that I scare people away!
  24. Big Harv

    Big Harv TRIBE Member

    Yeah, once you enter the stall, you have entered a quiet zone and are not entitled to converse with your neighbour.
  25. sk8

    sk8 TRIBE Member

    I'm with wiseman on this. cause it's awesome when you have a 2-year-old dancing around who has to pee and someone is in there doing that and then you have to smash yourself and two children into a stall so she doesn't pee her pants.

    suck it up and go in a regular bathroom - everybody poops, who cares who hears what. perhaps 10+ years of a digestive disease have somewhat desensitized me but the weirdness around bathroom stuff just mystefies me.


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