• Hi Guest: Welcome to TRIBE, the online home of TRIBE MAGAZINE. If you'd like to post here, or reply to existing posts on TRIBE, you first have to register. Join us!

The Mom Thread

peko

TRIBE Member
OC is really into Superheroes, especially the Incredible Hulk and Spiderman. :) This makes me very happy.

edit: she also pronounces Pocoyo as "peko" (at least that's how it sounds). hee
 
Alex D. from TRIBE on Utility Room

Metal Morphosis

TRIBE Member
Just a reminder to City of Toronto peeps - it's that time of year again - REGISTRATION DAY (on Wednesday).

who is the primary scheduler in your family? I'm thankful for my administrative background at times like these - you need to be super organized!

best of luck and godspeed - may the fastest clickers win!
 

leigh

TRIBE Promoter
Thanks again everyone. My husband is having more success getting baby to nap in the crib, but I'm happy to have him nap on me in the sling. (We both work from home so we split nap times). The problem is, at home we're now only able to get about half an hour naps, regardless of the method. And, according to the "sleep charts" I've seen, at his age (3 months) he should be doing 2 hours between naps but after 1 hour he's cranky and yawning. It's not even noon yet and we're on the third nap of the day! I know he can do substantial naps, because when we're out and about, he'll sometimes sleep for 3 hours.

This sleep stuff is complicated. I just want him to be well rested because I know how important it is for his development.

Awwnaw, as you can see, I have no idea what I'm doing, but I did shift my little guy's bedtime to a few hours earlier (from about 10:30 to 8pm) without any problems. We just moved the whole bedtime routine, and there wasn't even a transition period. The first night I put him to bed earlier, he went down without any fussing and slept really well. Overall he's not sleeping longer, but it did get rid of the "witching hour" crying for the most part, and now my husband and I get a couple of hours to ourselves before bed. Getting to sit down and eat dinner together was a real boost to my sanity. :)
 

awwnaw

TRIBE Member
I actually just started the 2,3,4 suggestion that I had not heard of until this thread. She is thriving! Completely syncs with when she is naturally drowsy and cranky. Thank you!!!
 

Metal Morphosis

TRIBE Member
Hooray for the 2-3-4! Glad you've found it to be useful. I'd wished I'd known about it with #1... Just like baby-led weaning... But you ladies don't have to worry about that for a little while.
 
tribe cannabis accessories silver grinders

mariazmess

TRIBE Member
So the Healthy Babies, Healthy Children nurse came over last week and weighed Melodie who just turned 8 months. From our bathroom scale, I thought she was hitting the 12 lbs mark, but she weighed in at 10 lbs, 5 oz. No where near the curve of where she should be in weight or height. Her head's the right size though. The nurse seemed a tad perplexed since she's hitting all the other milestones in terms of development. She's sitting up, grabbing at things, smiling and reacting, etc.

Anyway, we're amping up the food -- adding high fat yogurt (10%!!!), avocado, etc. and trying to increase my milk supply. I *have* been under a lot of stress (duh) and maybe she's not been getting as much milk as she could have been. But she hasn't been complaining.

Sigh. This whole "raising children" thing. Who fucking knew?! (AND WHY THE FUCK DIDN'T THEY TELL US?!?!!)

Anyway, seeing another nurse and pediatrician on Friday. Hopefully I can get her up in weight with solids before then. I'm also hoping the probiotics help her poop, because I don't want her gaining 3 lbs of backed up poopage!
 

awwnaw

TRIBE Member
Can babies have fatty things? I watch my friends give their kids a lot of avocado and was one of the first foods they ate regularly. Forgive me for my stupidity. I can only handle reading baby info like 6 weeks before mine will reach that stage or I get too overwhelmed by all the shit I need to know.

Ya 2,3,4 is/was a godsend. Thanks so much again. You guys are SO helpful.

Oh just realized I had another question. So as you may recall I swaddle my girl. She's shown a wee but of crankiness while I'm putting her in it (then stills immediately after its complete) so I tried to go sans swaddle. No dice. Wakes up. Won't go down easily. If she does wakes herself up easily. So Imma keep swaddling. I have heard however I need to stop once she learns to roll over. She just did, once but hasn't repeated it. Thoughts? I also use positioners cause she's such a thrasher and I was worried if her thrashing her way over. Is it ok to continue indefinitely while she's happy? All these warnings before that has me so worried (like no swaddling) seem like nonsense now. It seems like it would be a challenge for anyone, baby or adult to move onto their fronts from a restricted position.
 

mcbee

TRIBE Member
babies can totally have high fat foods....but high fat foods from 'healthy' sources, ie high fat yogurt, avocados, homo milk etc. Not big macs lol. We did baby lead weaning so Brooklyn got pretty much everything, we just kept it low salt/low sugar. We also avoided honey (not recommended until after 1) but gave all other traditionally avoided foods...eggs, peanut butter, shellfish etc.

as far as swaddling, I'd say go with baby's lead...if she's happy, she's happy. A bunch of moms in my moms group did long term swaddling and swaddled until 8 or 9 months. When Brooklyn was done, she was DONE and clearly let us know.

AFM, Brooklyn has been in her toddler crib since Christmas and will be moving to her big girl bed in a few weeks. For whatever reason, she had never clued in to the fact she could actually get out of bed on her own. She figured it out this weekend....gah! She appeared in my bedroom, crying 4x times last night between 2 and 4am. GAH. I feel like I"m nursing a newborn again. Not looking forward to dealing with a night waking toddler AND a nursing newborn in 4 months.

:) sarah
 

janiecakes

TRIBE Member
Long-term swaddler here. I think we swaddled for close to a year. I think it's fine as long as it's working and you're thinking about safety. There are some potential issues with overheating and hip problems, but I just made sure he wasn't overdressed and once he wasn't a newborn anymore his legs were free - it was just the arms that were wrapped up.
 
tribe cannabis accessories silver grinders

Metal Morphosis

TRIBE Member
AFM, Brooklyn has been in her toddler crib since Christmas and will be moving to her big girl bed in a few weeks. For whatever reason, she had never clued in to the fact she could actually get out of bed on her own. She figured it out this weekend....gah! She appeared in my bedroom, crying 4x times last night between 2 and 4am. GAH. I feel like I"m nursing a newborn again. Not looking forward to dealing with a night waking toddler AND a nursing newborn in 4 months.

:) sarah

ahhaha!!! you totally jinxed yourself since you were just telling me how she hadn't figured out that she could just get out on her own! at least she's old enough to reason with... somewhat. i suspect she'll get over this pretty quickly. right before bed you could maybe suggest that if she wakes in the night, to call out to you rather than coming into your room. let her know that you can hear her from her room and will come to tuck her back in.
 

awwnaw

TRIBE Member
Leigh she'll be 4 months in a week and I started this the moment I read the post.

I used to nap her, but what I thought was just sleep cues and my instinct. I had no idea I should put her down so soon to waking. And I used to try to squeeze in another evening nap around 6-7. She responded to this guideline right away and it has also helped with the evening bitchiness.

Thanks so much for the reassurance Janie and McBee ! I'm gonna swaddle til she completely trips and doesn't want it any more.
 
Last edited:

leigh

TRIBE Promoter
That's great that the 2-3-4 is working awwnaw! My little guy is still doing 3-4 naps a day, so it feels we're still far away from trying this out.

What's everyone's take on soothers? Again, another battle of wills in our household - when Theo is screaming his little head off I feel best to just give him the soother as it really calms him. My husband on the other hand is so reluctant to give into it as he's worried about the soother being a habit that becomes hard to break or something that Theo will increasingly depend on during the day.

We're both self employed and my husband has opted to work from home because I don't get a maternity leave and he wants to be part of the parenting process. But my goodness, this co-parenting thing is so challenging, having to constantly compromise on your decisions.
 

Liability

TRIBE Member
That's great that the 2-3-4 is working awwnaw! My little guy is still doing 3-4 naps a day, so it feels we're still far away from trying this out.

What's everyone's take on soothers? Again, another battle of wills in our household - when Theo is screaming his little head off I feel best to just give him the soother as it really calms him. My husband on the other hand is so reluctant to give into it as he's worried about the soother being a habit that becomes hard to break or something that Theo will increasingly depend on during the day.

We're both self employed and my husband has opted to work from home because I don't get a maternity leave and he wants to be part of the parenting process. But my goodness, this co-parenting thing is so challenging, having to constantly compromise on your decisions.

I was very soother resistant as well. We started using a soother for nights and naps. We also used them sparingly in the car and on walks. Soother was eliminated from all but sleep time as soon as speech started. This seemed to work well and didn't have any noticeable interference with speech development. Our daughter weened off fairly easily from the night time soother at around 2. The daytime nap soother disappeared earlier as soothers were not allowed at daycare.

Yeah, the co-parenting thing is tough. Partners can 'agree to disagree' on debatable points before a kid, but when you are making decisions for someone under your care it becomes different.
 

mcbee

TRIBE Member
That's great that the 2-3-4 is working awwnaw! My little guy is still doing 3-4 naps a day, so it feels we're still far away from trying this out.

What's everyone's take on soothers? Again, another battle of wills in our household - when Theo is screaming his little head off I feel best to just give him the soother as it really calms him. My husband on the other hand is so reluctant to give into it as he's worried about the soother being a habit that becomes hard to break or something that Theo will increasingly depend on during the day.

We're both self employed and my husband has opted to work from home because I don't get a maternity leave and he wants to be part of the parenting process. But my goodness, this co-parenting thing is so challenging, having to constantly compromise on your decisions.

We have a soother kid in this house. We implemented it as part of the sleep routine when a baby. She never really took to it as a newborn, but did as a baby. We offered it for every nap and for night sleep. And made daytime exceptions for when she was sick and teething. She's almost 3 and still has it for sleep only. And as far as language, she started speaking early and progressed really fast. So I don't think it made any impact there. That being said, we are going to have a helluva time shortly giving them to the soother fairy, but we will do it. I don't want her having a soother and a newborn with a soother lol.

I'd go back to this idea that especially early on, do what you need to do to survive and the rest will work itself out.

:) sarah
 
tribe cannabis accessories silver grinders

awwnaw

TRIBE Member
We're night/sleep soother people too. She doesn't need it the entire time, and doesn't necessarily wail for it. If it falls put I let her try to soothe herself a bit. If she's reallllly having a tough time getting to sleep or is overtired I'll keep popping it I'm until she dozes off. I really think it helps her concentrate and well soothe, so she can drift off easily.

I suspect it becomes an issue becomes when parents offer the soother early on, at every sign of discomfort or crankiness.

It's not that complicated. It's just a soother. It's not like you're getting the dog to babysit.

Whenever I want to holler at my husband, "we're doing it my way!! I'm her mom!!!!" I remember just how lucky she is (and I am) that she she has a dad that is involved and cares as much about her well being as I do. He could not give a crap either way, and that is much worse ;)

Good luck!
 

Metal Morphosis

TRIBE Member
we tried a soother with Elliot but he flat out refused. there were times when we were out and he was screaming that i really, really wished that he would have taken one, but in the long run I'm glad that he didn't. we didn't even bother trying with Thomas, but he got hooked on the bottle pretty early - i think he was 20+ mos when we finally scrapped the bottle in favour of sippy cups for milk.
 

stryker

TRIBE Member
we tried a soother with Elliot but he flat out refused. there were times when we were out and he was screaming that i really, really wished that he would have taken one, but in the long run I'm glad that he didn't. we didn't even bother trying with Thomas, but he got hooked on the bottle pretty early - i think he was 20+ mos when we finally scrapped the bottle in favour of sippy cups for milk.

Arwynn is also like this. She has no love for the soother whatsoever. I wish she would but instead she enjoys gnawing on her knuckles. I have no idea what's going to happen once her teeth come through.


stew :)
 

awwnaw

TRIBE Member
Stryker my girl has lately been eating her fist so much its causing abrasions on her fingers. Today I out a cushy men's ankle length sweat sock mon her hand and problem solved. Goes all the ay up to her shoulder. At this age while the buds are forming I'm told its cause their gums are almost itchy so their hands or fabric feels good.
 

leigh

TRIBE Promoter
Whenever I want to holler at my husband, "we're doing it my way!! I'm her mom!!!!" I remember just how lucky she is (and I am) that she she has a dad that is involved and cares as much about her well being as I do. He could not give a crap either way, and that is much worse ;)

Good luck!

I didn't mean to sound ungrateful. I know how lucky baby and I are to have him take such an active roll in all of this. But I'll be honest, I have whipped out the "we're doing it my way!" on occasion in frustration :D

Good to know the hand chewing is normal at this age!
 
tribe cannabis accessories silver grinders

stryker

TRIBE Member
Stryker my girl has lately been eating her fist so much its causing abrasions on her fingers. Today I out a cushy men's ankle length sweat sock mon her hand and problem solved. Goes all the ay up to her shoulder. At this age while the buds are forming I'm told its cause their gums are almost itchy so their hands or fabric feels good.

ahhh...this totally makes sense. She has a knitted sweater thing and since about two weeks ago all she does is chew on it.

stew :)
 

rubytuesday

TRIBE Member
L still uses a soother for naps and night-time a little bit, it's no longer as essential as his blankie (and he can make do without that too now if he has to). We started limiting it during the day at some point last year, and just gradually cut it back to bedroom only without much fuss. He's been entirely soother-less at his grandparents for months now so we could just take it entirely away but I think it's really harmless, he would ask for it at their place but not cry and they'd just distract him and make sure he didn't find one lying around somewhere, he stopped wanting it over there pretty quickly as long as he didn't see it. I'm expecting he'll drop it entirely without really noticing in the next few months (before he turns 3).

He's speaking sentences now, when the soother was making it hard to understand him we'd take it out and that's when we really started limiting it I think. Overall it was great for us, great for him to have access to if say he was hungry and we were stuck in traffic or if we were out and he had to wait a little bit. At night it could be annoying because he's not a great sleeper and we'd have to replace it for him at night at certain ages so I can see why some people are against it. I know peko swears by the soother-toy thing for dealing with some of these issues.
 

peko

TRIBE Member
I do love wubbanubs. We're weaning/weeding them out slowly (bedtime only, etc.). I got a Grover doll to replace the suckies. Turning 3 is ramping up to be big things.

Reilly is a thumb sucker. She used to suck hard but is sucking less (11 months) lately. I remember using olive oil on her thumb and hand when she sucked it raw/red (beginning of winter).
 

awwnaw

TRIBE Member
I love wubanubs because they're too heavy for her to fire across the room when she spits them out! Given me hours of extra sleep!
 

geminigirl

TRIBE Member
As a sleep consultant/sleep trainer & a parent of a 2 year old little girl, I am a big fan of soothers. They buy me *lots* of sleep over here! Presley loves her soothers dearly. They help calm/relax her so much.

I figure that I will face the hurdle of taking it away around 3(ish).
 
tribe cannabis accessories silver grinders
Top