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The Mom Thread

awwnaw

TRIBE Member
I think the armsreach co-sleeper is the best solution for us. I think any sleep I'd gain having her in our actual bed, I would lose sleeping so lightly out of worry of harming her. I suppose a slight stretch to lift her out isn't the worst as I'm a really light sleeper and don't envision being able to sleep through breast feeding anyway (but I've always never been consistently sleep deprived for months on end).

Maria so do you have this co sleeper now? I wasn't totally sure--it sounds like you put the baby down in your bed and then move it to the cosleeper?

Peko: how does cosleeping contribute to too much CO2!! Did you find it hard to get up to feed if the were in the other room? It's these logistical things I'm such a clueless fool bout. The monitor has to be loud enough to alert your get up wouldn't it? So wouldn't that be louder than the sounds babies make when they sleep? Also, what fecking sounds?!!! They make sounds other than crying?

And sonuvabitch, you can make yogurt out of breast milk?!!! I'm intrigued and grossed out at the same time. Brilliant idea. I'm grossed out by the thought of my own breast milk and it being consumed altogether, in spite of the fact that it's the most natural thing in the world and I'm being a juvenile idiot. Presumably one immediately gets over this!
 

sk8

TRIBE Member
awwnaw - I am thoroughly enjoying your posts and reminiscing about when I had my first and everything was all foreign and crazy sounding. Don't worry too much about the fiddly details - it'll all work itself out and you'll find what works best for you and your family. I'm not saying there won't be a bit of trial and error first though LOL.

I got the yolife lol what a name.
It provides a steady temperature, came with glass jars, but you can also use your own jars, as it gives you two covers, a short and tall one. I am not making THAT much yogurt to use HUGE jars, so the ones that came with it are great.

Made my first batch with breast milk and came out bomb-diggidy (for my son). I also made with organic goat milk and also came out bomb-diggidy (will start giving that yogurt to him when he turns 9 months, which is in couple of weeks). You can add fresh fruits, flavours (agave, nuts, etc...), etc after the yogurt is done, or add it during... I prefer to add it after, because I can control the flavouring and freshness.
Breast-milk yogurt with chia seeds and real honey is a big hit with him now.

Very happy with it so far.

OK cool, thanks, I'll look into that one. I can only eat yogurt that has the real mccoy cultures in it and it gets pricey, but it's one of my only sources of calcium so I'd like to make it myself out of my "safe" milk and save some money at the same time. Plus Maya is a yogurt junkie too. The one I had before had a bunch of single-serve size containers, like 10, and then I'd have to stack those all in the fridge. I don't want a giant batch necessarily (but with 4 people it does need to be substantial) - but I want it all in one container!

I like my yogurt plain with honey too :)
 

peko

TRIBE Member
I got the yolife lol what a name.

Props to you for making your own yogurt! That's hardcore awesome love.

When we switched to Grocery Gateway I had to switch yogurts, so now I buy plain Liberte Organic and add organic fruit (buy fresh, rinse, freeze, defrost, smush) with a bit of cane sugar.

When you add fruit to your yogurt, do you add it fresh or frozen? I find when it's frozen whole and defrosted, it's more like a fruit jam.

Off Topic but serious question: If an unpasturized smoked apple cheddar cheese had a date due of 2 weeks ago, would you still use it? Or chuck it? Can you just cut the white mold off of unpasturized brick cheese?
 

rubytuesday

TRIBE Member
mariazmess, I am so happy you have a king size mattress in your future! And awesome that your 3 year old is sleeping in his trundle. L is starting to kick us out of his floor bed while we're putting him to sleep (we usually just read him books and lie next to him while he falls asleep). It's funny/amazing after 2 years of cosleeping to have that change on his part so suddenly, we're running with it and doing more of a routine in his room in the hopes that it will stick.

I did straight up bedsharing from day 1, but it was June and not winter so it was easier to keep bedding to a minimum. I'd just put L up high beside me (after nursing) and we use memory foam pillows which are hard to smother on. I did my best to keep the duvet well away from L but it did creep up sometimes, and babies have a way of squirming into armpits and mama's boobs. I know that bedsharing can be dangerous, but L was a big healthy baby with great head control (I had to side lie to get him to latch properly, he had to be in control haha) so I felt more comfortable with the risk, but we did sleep more lightly at first. I've heard of some mamas making themselves arm warmers out of old shirts so they can nurse but also have their arms covered so they're less tempted to pull the blanket up past their waists while they're half asleep. We have a queen and with a baby it is do-able, now that L is a lanky 2 year old it's less than ideal (props to mariazmess for making it work for so long). It was the only way I would have been able to breastfeed L for as long as I did, because I was back at school after 13 weeks. Cosleeping and breastfeeding was the answer for us, but I don't think it's clear what will work until the baby arrives. :)
 

peko

TRIBE Member
Peko: how does cosleeping contribute to too much CO2!! Did you find it hard to get up to feed if the were in the other room? It's these logistical things I'm such a clueless fool bout. The monitor has to be loud enough to alert your get up wouldn't it? So wouldn't that be louder than the sounds babies make when they sleep? Also, what fecking sounds?!!! They make sounds other than crying ?

C02 - during my first pregnancy in 2009, I read something about C02 pooling around your neck or something, so it could contribute to smoothering (or SIDs, can't remember). Might be more of a bed sharing risk, I dunno? It freaked me out, so it was a big negative for me. :eek:

By the time I had Oksana, we already had a crib and it was something both MO and I agreed on. At this point I was focused on other baby things.

With Reilly, we're doing what works for us with a twist by exposing her to everyday noise when she sleeps rather then keeping the house absolutely quiet. Plus, I don't nap during the day anymore because I'm getting ready for the next meal, putting things away, laundry and spending time with Reilly while OC sleeps.

Current research shows that cosleeping (like Maria's extendabed or having the crib in mama's room) reduces the risk of SIDs - check out Dr. Sears, he explains the benefits well. MariazMess, RubyTuesday & Janiecakes can tell you how to do it right too.

Babies make all kinds of cute noises, like chewing noises, squeals, grunts, etc.... I like it. Yes, it's hard sometimes to get up and feed or change the baby in the middle of the night but I don't mind. Your body adjusts to the lack of sleep, broken sleep and ability to tune into baby cries. I'm a light sleeper with babies and we keep both of our doors open, so I can hear her when she cries. Our place is small, so she's about 15 ft from me.

Monitors were useless in our house and created more noise when I got up to go to Oksana's room (created a deafening screech sound), picked up the tv and PS3 video sounds better then the baby noises.

The first 6-8 months are hard work but worth it. If you find it hard, get help or support so you get sleep or a break whenever possible. Even if it means sleeping large chunks of the day away (syncing naps with baby - I miss those days).

As mentioned by the rest of the mamas - All babies are different and you'll know what works for your family! :)
 
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barkley

TRIBE Member
Ruby - I thought you sidecarred a crib? That's what we did this time, but so far both boys usually just like to sleep snuggled right up close to me on our mattress and that's pretty much what we've done since we brought them home. At first I was a bit nervous because they were so much smaller than Zoe was, but it's all good now. We had the Arm's Reach for Zoe and it was great, but by the time she was 4 months old she had outgrown it and we brought them crib in our room anyway.
 

mariazmess

TRIBE Member
Maria so do you have this co sleeper now? I wasn't totally sure--it sounds like you put the baby down in your bed and then move it to the cosleeper?
We all go to sleep in "our own beds" and when the baby wakes up at ungodly hours when i can barely lift my head, I just bring her into bed with me and put a boob in her mouth. If she's hungry, great, if not, then I have to get it together and change her diaper. I love this age when it's one or the other!! If she's happy with boob, then we often fall asleep together in the same bed. If I wake up later and she's out cold, I might move her back to her bed, I might not. I often don't want to risk waking her again, but she's still so little, I worry. As she gets chubbier and sturdier, I'll probably keep her in bed with us more. Eventually she'll outgrow the co-sleeper and she'll stay in bed with us.


If an unpasturized smoked apple cheddar cheese had a date due of 2 weeks ago, would you still use it? Or chuck it? Can you just cut the white mold off of unpasturized brick cheese?
Cut off the bad stuff and enjoy the rest. If it tastes off, then do with it what you will.
mariazmess, I am so happy you have a king size mattress in your future! And awesome that your 3 year old is sleeping in his trundle. (props to mariazmess for making it work for so long).
We made it work for so long because dad's been away at school over the last year (since September). He was home every other weekend and more than happy to snuggle with his fam. I'm very very excited for the king size - but parents always end up in the "about to fall out" position...!
 

KillaLadY

TRIBE Member
When you add fruit to your yogurt, do you add it fresh or frozen? I find when it's frozen whole and defrosted, it's more like a fruit jam.

Always fresh and ripe. I add it the moment I feed it to him. The only time I use frozen fruits is when I make a smoothie.

Question: is this common that when I change put on/change his diaper before he goes to bed, he screams like I am cutting him?
What gives?
 
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Jennika

TRIBE Member
moms of older kids, what age for letting your kid bike on the road with you?

Ben just mastered the two wheeler but he's great at it, in fact today we biked from King west to Dufferin Grove and back and he was confident the whole way. i started to let him ride in front of me on some side streets, staying close and giving him instruction. He did great, but now I'm wondering if I should wait on that.
he's almost 6
 

rubytuesday

TRIBE Member
Oops the last part was "cosleeping and breastfeeding AT NIGHT was the answer for our situation".

Ruby - I thought you sidecarred a crib? That's what we did this time, but so far both boys usually just like to sleep snuggled right up close to me on our mattress and that's pretty much what we've done since we brought them home. At first I was a bit nervous because they were so much smaller than Zoe was, but it's all good now. We had the Arm's Reach for Zoe and it was great, but by the time she was 4 months old she had outgrown it and we brought them crib in our room anyway.

Ahh, too cute to imagine too little ones beside you! And twins do the coolest things when they are beside each other, I remember my identical twin brothers would be like little mirror images of one another sometimes.

I did plan to sidecar, but the sidecar wasn't set up for a few weeks after L was born and L ended up in bed with me anyway once he started sleeping like shit (at the 4 month regression), before that I'd pull him over to nurse around 3 a.m. and I never had the willpower to put him back after that, I'd wake up for the day with no memory of how L got in between us.
Side-carring was good for putting baby in one spot and knowing where he was when we came in to sleep, if he had slept better it would have been great. Once he was moving around a lot we got rid of the bedframe and slept on the floor, that improved my sleep knowing he wouldn't have far to fall if he fell out of bed (the only time he ever did roll out of bed was at our in-laws one night, he was very good at crying out and waiting for us after that until he could get down on his own). Then at some point we got a second mattress to make room for all of us (babies really do have a way of taking up the whole bed haha), and if L's sleep was really bad one of us would take it into another room to try to get some uninterrupted sleep.
When we moved into a 2 bedroom we got a futon mattress and that has been L's bed from the first night. We continued sleeping with him (taking turns), but he knows that's his room and that our bed is ours. We have the crib beside the futon mattress, and started putting him in the crib when he seemed to roll into us a lot and be sort of screwed up by having the space to keep rolling, and he slept better after that for a while. L sleeps in the crib half the time now, sometimes he asks to go in it to fall asleep, sometimes we just transfer him, sometimes he sleeps through the night, sometimes he wakes up halfway through and asks to come out, and sometimes (like if he's sick or having night terrors) we just keep him on the floor bed because we found he was worse if he woke up alone. My complicated little man haha.

Oh I found a children's food blog that I like, not an ideas blog but an advice blog: It's Not About Nutrition - Blog. It's in the vein of "it's not your job to make your kid eat", but has some new ideas I like. One is to mix up what you serve for breakfast, even if your kid always eats their breakfast, to teach them to expect different things to appear in the menu consistently, that way dinner is not some weird anomali.
 

KillaLadY

TRIBE Member
I had the arm's reach as well until he outgrew it, he now sleeps in bed with me and will be in bed until he is ready for a "big boy" bed.

I don't really care much for all the useless studies that are done regarding this, it's what I know from back home, I still breastfeed, I am happy, he is happy.

It's a lifestyle choice more than anything.
 
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geminigirl

TRIBE Member
On the topic of co-sleeping...

One thing that surprised me the most with parenting my little girl was how open I have become to co-sleeping.

For the most part, Presley is in her crib. She is 17 months tomorrow. She has one nap a day for approx. 2-3 hours. Naps are almost always in her crib, however the odd time she wakes up mid-nap and I bring her in my pitch dark room with sound machine nice and loud coming through the monitor & she finishes her nap with me.
On a typical night she sleeps 8pm-5:30/6am in her crib and then when she cries, I bring her in my bed and she sleeps until 7-8am(sometimes 9am).
When she is teething, like right now she comes in my bed in the middle of the night(last night at 3am). There is something so wonderful about cuddling with your baby/toddler in the night. I *love* waking up to her beside me. My common law sleeps in a separate room because he has epilepsy and sleep issues.
I have zero issues with Presley calling for me in the night to come get her. I am all for everyone getting as much sleep as possible. There is *no* way that morning is starting when she first wakes at 5-6am. It is the best thing ever that she has learned that it's not morning yet and to go back to sleep with mommy.
I did sleep train her at 12 months so that I was no longer entertaining soothers and wakings. That really did help her sleep skills - big time. But with teething there is often regression. I find it so much harder to just leave her as she get older. The smile on her face when I bring her in my bed is priceless and we cuddle while falling back to sleep. Nothing better. :)

Every family sitch is so unique. We all do what makes the most sense to us.
 

kuba

TRIBE Member
Argh.

Transitioning from crib to normal bed has become a disaster. Just started this week after my son started to jump out of his crib regularly. Bought a normal bed and now its 10pm and still not a chance he's asleep with my wife in there w/ him. Wakes up at 5am and comes into our bed (we're OK with that) until about 6am (too early, in crib was 7am).

We're keeping same routing (bath, book etc) but now that he knows he can get out its a long-running disaster.

Should we lock the door from the outside?

I've read a lot of blogs and most say to stick with what we had working but now that freedom is available nothing is working.
 

sk8

TRIBE Member
Kuba - we didn't have the same issue per se, but we did have concerns with Elissa when she first switched to a big bed because her room is directly at the top of the stairs and we were worried about her wandering to find us at night and falling. So for the first while we put a baby gate in her doorway, so she could come over and yell for us if needed but she couldn't get out. If he's a climber that might not work though.... plus we had to stop doing this for potty training LOL

If you do decide to keep him in his room just make sure everything in there is secured, because if he does wake up and can't get out then there is a possibility that he will climb furniture (both my girls did this).
 

mariazmess

TRIBE Member
My mom says that she threatened me with tying me to the bed and explained how dangerous it was for me to get out of my crib and not go straight to her (cuz maybe I actually got out of my crib and LEFT THE HOUSE - lol).

kuba: I would ask the kid if he wants to go back in the crib, and if he wants you to lock the door from the outside. These are not fun options -- explain to him what his options are, and what you want him to do in his bed (sleep). A compromise could be one extra story, and you should get a light with a timer that comes on when he's allowed to get up in the morning.
 
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KillaLadY

TRIBE Member
If the child isn't ready to transition, you will have a lot of rebelling, crying, temper-tantrums, etc...

You can also have your wife co-sleep with him until he feels safe enough to be on his own.
 

mariazmess

TRIBE Member
i haven't had the chance or the wherewithal to sit down and write the story. it's a long one.

on another note, i get to go to my office baby shower tomorrow. I can't say that I'm angry that I'm not pregnant in this heat!!

on yet another note, Matteo has started saying, "aw shit!" half cute, half not.
 

awwnaw

TRIBE Member
^sorry but pretty cute ;)

What age do kids typically transition to a regular bed? What is the usual cue? They start trying to climb out so it becomes unsafe?
 

sk8

TRIBE Member
That's one of those things noone can really answer - it depends on the kid and situation. Some climb, some don't. Some get siblings and their parents don't want 2 cribs so they get transitioned, some don't. Some co-sleep so stay in their parents beds longer, some want their bed back and transition. I really don't think there is a clear cut answer on that.

My two were both transitioned to "big girl beds" around 2. Both times because the crib was needed elsewhere (sibling and cousin) but they were ready for sure. Both loved being in a "big" bed. We didn't do toddler beds or any in between stuff.
 
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