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The Importance of Civility

M

mingster

TRIBE Member
Another interesting study in the science of human interactions.

As I continue to explore and learn about message board "etiquette", if you will, I continue to find so many things interesting. Some of you might dismiss this conversation, saying that real life has no bearing on what is created on a message board. I personally, disagree.

I've noticed a few scenarios that interest me. And wish to discuss them....2 people know of each other, but have never met. They choose to ignore each others presence at public functions. I suppose there could be many reasons for this and of course, no one is obliged to acknowledge the presence of another. But I find this curious, in that it seems to say something about an interaction that is created on-line. Which begs the question, if the on-line interaction is not pertinent to real life, why do get this result? About this result, I find it can be dissapointing. Perhaps it is the persona created that interfers with what could be a productive relationship, in which case, this is unfortunate.

What an interesting and self-protective world we live in when we know of each other and choose to build and maintain barriers...for what reason?

It is natural to choose your entourage. But to choose it based on a pre-conceived idea seems.....hurtful sometimes. Of course, we can't be friends with everybody. Maybe people trust that they will find each other.

I have no answers. Just questions.
Your comments are welcome.

Ming.
 
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M

mingster

TRIBE Member
lol.
Maybe not. Maybe I was just rambling.
Maybe I'm just looking for some insight, or some answers.

Maybe I should just keep my thoughts to myself.

*note to self*
Rambling on the internet is NOT like talking to yourself, Melanie.

Ming.
 
P

PosTMOd

Well-Known TRIBEr
Civility means formal or perfunctory politeness.

Two people ignoring each other is civil compared to, say, saying bad things about each other to others, or putting broken glass down the back of each other's pants.
 
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M

mingster

TRIBE Member
Originally posted by PosTMOd
Civility means formal or perfunctory politeness.

Two people ignoring each other is civil compared to, say, saying bad things about each other to others, or putting broken glass down the back of each other's pants.
Click to expand...

Civility could be subjective, depending on the specific people, I suppose.

Why must civility be a maximum interaction?
It should be a minimum.

Ming.
 
M

mingster

TRIBE Member
Originally posted by mingster
What an interesting and self-protective world we live in when we know of each other and choose to build and maintain barriers...for what reason?
Click to expand...

I wonder if past centuries have had to deal with new ways of interacting, like we have created with the internet. The internet is relatively new to us,I suppose we're still learning how to use it, how to be people with it. Maybe it's all wrong.

Ming.
 
R

Rosey

TRIBE Member
a lot of people can chat about things on the internet. but when you meet in 'real life', you don't want to talk about the internet, yet, that is your common interest or bond. so until a further level of interaction can be developed, not much more can or will be said in a 'real life' meeting. it just takes time.
 
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M

mingster

TRIBE Member
No. But I've seen it be as far as some will go.
Meh...S'ok Timo, you don't have to humor me. I was just having verbal diarhea. :)

Ming.
 
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PosTMOd

Well-Known TRIBEr
I was humouring myself.

Well, that and trying to get you to use a dictionary next time a word like civility pops into your head and you feel like [mis]using it.
 
P

Pyrovitae

TRIBE Member
with this medium comes miscommunication. actually, with human interaction comes miscommunication.

i haven't introduced myself on a few occasions to others who i "knew" from this board by their persona, because a) i assumed they wouldn't care to meet me, b) i can be surprisingly shy in a group setting, & c) i didn't know what to say. ("hi, i'm "pyrovitae", you may recognize me from such posts as...")

as an aside, i no longer have time to surf the 'net at work and wonder why i do so in my free time. i think i need i hiatus from this message board...it seems as if it's invading my life in a very real way. i don't like it. the melodrama here is actually starting to personally affect me. the internet is becoming a substitute for individual interaction, and i miss the friends who don't talk about the day's controversial topic on tribe, etc. (this is not meant to be an insult to anyone.)

i need a l'il break. (i still love you message board. really. *muahz*. <ahnold> i'll be back. </ahnold>)

not to say that i haven't met some real friends from this medium...but i wonder...if i turned my computer *off*, how many of you would i remain in contact with? not very many, i imagine.

bye for now, people. be well. :)

*muah*
~N

"it is not too late to become what you might have been"~george elliot
 
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E

echootje

TRIBE Member
Part of my english-european upbringing is the belief that I must be civil at all costs.

A lot of people mistake Canadians being "nice" for what they really are "polite and civil". Humouring Americans is civility in practice.

Not sure what this thread is about but just thought I'd spout anyways. :)

Rob
 
B

Booty Bits

TRIBE Member
maybe some people assume that if someone's posts are consistently offensive/unfunny/insane/ignorant/useless, that this person would be the same in person.

i have met many people who are exceptions to this rule (like, someone who is a loudmouth on the board but really shy in person) but i don't think its wrong for someone to at least partly judge someone for what they say online.

heck, if you don't want your comments to reflect on the kind of person you are, you wouldn't say them... or else you're just an idiot. (not directed at anyone in particular)

if i ignore someone in person, its highly doubtful that i have been engaging them in an electronic medium at the same time.
 
M

mingster

TRIBE Member
Originally posted by Booty Bits
maybe some people assume that if someone's posts are consistently offensive/unfunny/insane/ignorant/useless, that this person would be the same in person.

i have met many people who are exceptions to this rule (like, someone who is a loudmouth on the board but really shy in person) but i don't think its wrong for someone to at least partly judge someone for what they say online.
Click to expand...

I have as well. I like being surprised like this.

heck, if you don't want your comments to reflect on the kind of person you are, you wouldn't say them... or else you're just an idiot. (not directed at anyone in particular)

if i ignore someone in person, its highly doubtful that i have been engaging them in an electronic medium at the same time.
Click to expand...

Points taken. But do you not feel like you might be missing out on something (someone) special?

Ming.
 
P

PosTMOd

Well-Known TRIBEr
Originally posted by Booty Bits
... or else you're just an idiot...
Click to expand...

Well, that pretty well sums me up.

But, sometimes (yeah, right, just sometimes) it's fun to be an idiot... idiot on the board, idiot off the board, just an idiot all around.

*does a little idiot prance*
 
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