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Stupid male behaviour?

Discussion in 'TRIBE Main Forum' started by DaftPunky, Aug 27, 2003.

  1. DaftPunky

    DaftPunky TRIBE Member

    Last night, after speaking with two completely unrelated, unacquainted male friends, I have discovered an alarming pattern in them. Based on remarks made by each relevant to their respective "situations", it became very clear that neither of them know how to properly start a romantic relationship with members of the opposite sex.

    Both have recently met girls after a relatively long hiatus from the dating game. While I'm happy for them, I fear that their approach will land them back in the single life very soon. My first conversation on the topic was at around 8:00 pm, and it kinda went like this:

    Him: "Yeah, so Shirley and I are kinda dating now..."
    Me: "Cool. Hows that workin' out?"
    Him: "Fucking awesome. She's the best chick I've ever met."
    Me: "Can't ask for more than that, can ya?"
    Him "Yeah, you should see me now. I'm totally different. Went out an' spent like $500 on new clothes."
    Me: "I noticed. You're dressing completely different than you used to. You like your new look?"
    Him: "Yeah, its fun. We're also going out to nice resturaunts almost every night. I don't do the same things I used to anymore."

    And the conversation kept on that tone for about 2 more minutes until I couldn't take it any more and decided to switch topics. At 11:30 or so, in a different place, met another friend, and he pretty much said the exact same things to me. Neither of them have been with their respective "partners" for any longer than 2 weeks.

    My question to any of you reading is: Do you have friends that have behaved in this fashion upon embarking on a new romantic relationship? What was the outcome of their "efforts"?

    I'd be most curious to know from the girls though: What if you were one of these girls involved in a new relationship. You started seeing the guy because you liked him for who he was, and the WAY he is. Then he went and started changing like my friends described themselves. What would you think about that? Even better, what if you overheard your new boyfriend having a conversation like that with someone? Something tells me a lot of girls wouldn't think its healthy.

    Any of you psycho-smart people have a rational explanation for this? Something just doesn't make sense to me in all of this. If I managed to score a girl I was quite interested in, I wouldn't go about changing as many things about myself as possible after actually starting the relationship. Kinda like false advertising, but in the wrong order. :confused:

    Hump-day deep thoughts...

    (just noticed - this is my 1000th post. Its official I guess... I'm addicted to TRIBE. But I think that's a whole other problem in itself. :) )
  2. Jeremy Jive

    Jeremy Jive TRIBE Member

    I prefer to get naked with a new partner rather than get new clothes.

    I'll go shopping afterwards.

    jeremy -my 2 pence- jive
  3. Spinsah

    Spinsah TRIBE Member

    sounds like your friends are using their new found relationships as a catalyst to enact some personal and stylistic changes. often people need the symbolic beginning of a new chapter (read: new girlfriend) in their life to embark on this 'revitalization'.
  4. mingster

    mingster TRIBE Member

    Nothing wrong with a little change. Especially if you've just ended a long-term relationship.

    Call it a rebound relationship with yourself.
  5. The Watcher

    The Watcher TRIBE Member

    Sounds like the girls are already molding them into what they want.

    You can't change a man, ... but you can alter him a little.
  6. physix

    physix TRIBE Member

    I think this behaviour happens to ALL seriel monogamists... regardless of gender....

  7. swenard

    swenard TRIBE Member

    I thought the best way to impress a woman, was to whip out your cock and start spanking them with it, while they're in the middle of doing something like washing the dishes.
  8. mingster

    mingster TRIBE Member

    What makes you think the men aren't altering themselves?

    The end of long-term relationships is often the best time to make some changes in your life. Your attitude, your clothes, your approach to future relationships. I don't know anything about Punky's friend's relationships, but I know that the end of a long-term relationship can be pretty intense and emotional. And a great catalyst for change, which shouldn't be shunned.

    Punky, sounds like your friends are discovering new life. Be excited for them. :)
  9. DaftPunky

    DaftPunky TRIBE Member

    I think that requires a very special bond between two people that can't be achieved in such a short time. Give it a month. One of the friends mentioned in the original post used to "show it" to his ex-girlfriend (while they were together) every chance he got. If they were watching TV, and she looked over to say something to him, he'd anticipate it and whip it out for her to see. EVERY CHANCE he could get.

    They didn't last long... *shrug*
  10. Ditto Much

    Ditto Much TRIBE Member

    I thought everyone did this when they started to see someone new. Couple of bnew outfits, chance to pick up a couple of new freinds in the social circles, maybe a new hobby or pass time to share.
  11. lucky1

    lucky1 TRIBE Member

    I don't really see anything wrong with trying to be your best in a new realationship. I mean if buying new clothes makes you feel confident in yourself there's nothing wrong with that. Someone who is confident and sure of themselves is way more attractive than someone who is clingy and insecure.
  12. DaftPunky

    DaftPunky TRIBE Member

    Oh, I am. Don't get me wrong. These guys very much want (and need) girlfriends. It just doesn't make sense what they're doing. They were very cool to begin with, quality personalities. I remember watching them trying to pick up these girls. They were being themselves, and were very successful as a result. But now they're going and changing a lot of things. Not saying they're becoming worse in any way, just different... but it just seems like there's no reason to change, as far as the relationship is concerned.

    I dunno... starting a new relationship can be awkward enough on its own. To transform the attitude & appearance of one of the participants after the ball is rolling only seems to add confusion.
  13. BigBadBaldy

    BigBadBaldy TRIBE Member

    That was my thought as well.
  14. deep

    deep TRIBE Member

    stfu hippie! they're just willing to do whatever necessary to get laid
  15. graham

    graham Well-Known TRIBEr

    nothing wrong with getting excited about a new situation.

    it's just enthusiasm, don't read too hard
  16. lok

    lok TRIBE Member

    Stupid male behavoir?

    Stupid male behavoir is duct taping two 40oz beers to each hand, and having to drink them both before being able to get the bottles off... thus making urinating, opening doors, do anything BUT drinking very tough.

    Above is merely an example of revitalization.. and getting laid :)
  17. Evil Dynovac

    Evil Dynovac TRIBE Member

    This is like, surgeon smart!

    Well said!
  18. sweetdaddy

    sweetdaddy TRIBE Member

    dude 1: "you know what the problem with this country is?...they should never have allowed immigration!"

    girl1: "what?...then you wouldn't be here"

    dude1: "I was born here"

    girl1: "but your dad was born in Austria"

    dude1: "that's different, he came here with his family to start a better life"


    this is the first words this dude said when he got back from his trip to Cancun.

    "holy shit, there were alot of mexicans there"


    pretty stupid male if you ask me.
  19. alcid

    alcid TRIBE Member

    That gives me an idea... looks like I've got some plans for the weekend after all! :D
  20. lok

    lok TRIBE Member

  21. lok

    lok TRIBE Member

    Its so bad. Fucking residence fucked me up :)
  22. EffinHard

    EffinHard TRIBE Member

    My friend received a broken heart and not 1 month later was in a relationship he dubbed "the best thing thats ever happened to him" with a girl who has a 2 year old son, wasnt interested in him until he got a 40K job, and she works nights. Within 4 months he decides that they should live together, he babysits every night until she gets home at midnight. He spends more time with her kid then she does. Hes a really nice guy, super funny and not butt ugly at all, but hes lame because he doesnt realise that he grabbed the first girl who slept with him (on the first date).

    I guess he finds it fun being 23 acting like he's 40. Worst of all she is such a townie hick.

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