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seinfeld quote thread

dr. claw

"The sea was angry that day, my friends, like an old man trying to send back soup in a deli."

"Horse manure's not that bad. I don't even mind the word manure. It's newer, which is good, and a ma in front of it. Ma-Newer. When you consider the other choices, manure is actually pretty refreshing"

"Don't you know what it means to become an orgy guy? It changes everything. I'd have to dress different. I'd have to act different. I'd have to grow a moustache and get all kinds of robes and lotions and I'd need a new bedspread and new curtains I'd have to get thick carpeting and weirdo lighting. I'd have to get new friends. I'd have to get orgy friends. ... Naw, I'm not ready for it."


TRIBE Member
^^ is that the personal trainer Friend of Jerry's dad? Who ends up in hospital because of his back after Jerry's work out?
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TRIBE Member
Originally posted by Snapper
Corporate Guy : George, the sea called, they're running out of shrimp!

George : Well, the jerk store called, they're running out of YOU!

Corporate Guy : Who cares, you're their #1 best seller!

George : Well, I had sex with your wife!
didn't the other co-workers say after that, "His wife is dead"??

Re: Shoe

TRIBE Member
Originally posted by vench
does anyone remember the episode where George goes for the interview to become a bra salesman, and while he's waiting for the elevator, rubs the fabric of the woman standing next to him in the hall?? she gets angry, walks off and basically gets him fired before he can even get hired??


the actress who played that woman, ended up playing one of his girlfriends in a later episode, the one when he is "enconsed in velvet". she sucks on his peach pit after he eats the famous peaches that Kramer and Newman love so much.

According to http://www.seinfeldscripts.com/TheDoodle.htm, "Paula" is played by ?Christa Miller

Is she the one you were looking for


TRIBE Member
One of Jerry's many ex's: You don't remember my name do you?

jerry recalling the name rhyming with a female body part


g/f: that's it im leaving

(approx 2min later)

Jerry yelling to the g/f outside his window:

OHHHHHH Dolores !!!
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TRIBE Member

I love the scene when George gets the wedding postponed (I think) and he's prancing and dancing down the street and twirling on the lamp posts.


Well-Known TRIBEr
Vandelay. Wait a second. Mr. Pennypacker, if you're here, and Mr. Vandelay is also here, then who's watching the factory?
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TRIBE Member
old guy: The best in the world. Which means I'm better
than just number one.

jerry: Well, I don't know how official any of these rankings really are.


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hahahaha... so glad to see this thread again...

"It's like going to Idaho and eating carrots. I like carrots, but I'm in Idaho... I want a potato."
- Jerry, in "The Masseuse"
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Prickly Pete

TRIBE Member
Originally posted by Buddy Holly
"....And I have two horses!!"

"What are their names?"

"....Snoopy and Prickly Pete"!


"Being a woman, I only really have access to the equipment, what, 30-45 minutes a week, and that's on a good week. How can I be expected to have the same expertise as people who own this equipment and have access to it 24 hours a day their entire lives?"
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