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R. Kelly - Sex Planet

Discussion in 'TRIBE Main Forum' started by Bacchus, May 24, 2007.

  1. Bacchus

    Bacchus TRIBE Promoter

    :eek: :eek: :eek:

    I thought this was a joke when I read it in a friend's journal. However, this is NO joke. This is an actual song of R. Kelly's upcomming album "Double Up"



    leaked MP3:

    It's funnier, because i've had "I'll piss on you" in my head all day yesterday.
  2. Michlerish

    Michlerish Well-Known TRIBEr

    meteor showers, eh?
  3. Bacchus

    Bacchus TRIBE Promoter

    yeah, Golden Meteor showers. :D
  4. Rajio

    Rajio Well-Known TRIBEr

    R Kelly is like 1980s Fresh Prince crossed with Slick rick (with a dash of shaggy)

    Just wait 'till you get to the verse about the black hole! Fuck you stephen hawking!
  5. Michlerish

    Michlerish Well-Known TRIBEr

    R. Kelly - In The Kitchen

    VERSE 1:
    Girl, you're in the kitchen
    cookin' me a meal
    Something makes me wanna come in there
    and get a feel
    Walk around in your T-shirt
    with nothing else on
    Struttin' past
    switching that ass
    while I’m on the phone

    Cuttin' up tomatoes
    Fruits and vegetables and potatoes
    Girl you look like so sexy doin' your damn thing
    that I want …
    Sex in the kitchen
    over by the stove
    Put you on the counter
    by the butter rolls
    Hands on the table
    on the tippy toes
    We'll be making love like the restaurant was closed

    This is what I'm ready to do:
    Girl - I'm - ready - to - toss - yo - salad!
    while making love girl, I'll be feasting.
  6. zoo

    zoo TRIBE Member

    r kelly has the worst lyrics ever
  7. Michlerish

    Michlerish Well-Known TRIBEr

    I prefer the remix version:

    I'm gonna give you some poo poo, I'm gonna give you some pee pee
  8. Boss Hog

    Boss Hog TRIBE Member

    Is this a reference to the ages he likes to rape?
  9. Flashy_McFlash

    Flashy_McFlash Well-Known TRIBEr

    Come on, this is awesome.

    R. Kelly is obviously a lunatic, but you know that if Andre 3000 had written this, you wouldn't bat an eye.

    Can't wait for the electro remix.
  10. PosTMOd

    PosTMOd Well-Known TRIBEr

    Yeah. 40 oz. of malt liquor make me want to tell you somethin'.

    Rollin round, sittin on dubs. Can't lie I was high on shrubs.

    Coolin in my Escalade. Man I'm paid, I got it made!

    Take me to your special place. Close your eyes, show me your face.

    I'm gonna piss on it!

    Haters wanna hate, lovers wanna love. I don't even want none of the above.

    I want to piss on you! Yes I do. I'll piss on you; I'll pee on you.

    Now your body, your body is a Porta-Potty.

    And my pee I'd kick; like it know's karate. (knows karate)

    I will Pee on you. Drip Drip Drip. Pee on you, go on you. Pisssss on you, Pisssss on you.

    And you'll never feel quite the same once you get a whiff, of my Hershey stains.

    I want to poop on you too. I want to pee in your food.

    Only thing that make my life complete is when I turn your face into a toilet seat.

    I want to pee on you! Yes I do. Yes I do, I want to pee on you, I'll piss on you

    Won't you braid my haiiiiiiir?
    Won't you braid my haiiiiiiir?

    Before we start, I'm gonna fart. I'm gonna fart on you.
  11. zoo

    zoo TRIBE Member

    you put too much stock into andre 3000, if he wrote an entire album of poorly written sex content, i'd think he sucked as well
  12. Flashy_McFlash

    Flashy_McFlash Well-Known TRIBEr

    R. Kelly makes R&B. That's what R&B is!
  13. Hal-9000

    Hal-9000 TRIBE Member

    Now that his sanity is gone, his genius is on full display.
  14. Interchange

    Interchange TRIBE Promoter

    Damn now i got that song "knocken dem boots" in my head - dont think its R. Kelly but its all the same
  15. The Truth

    The Truth TRIBE Member

    When da hell is he going on trial?
  16. smack

    smack TRIBE Member

    what happened to good old "I Believe I Can Fly" R. Kelly?
  17. AshG

    AshG Member

    fuckin right man.
    this'll just up the humour quotient that's been running high in my gr.9 science class ever since we touched on the topic of Uranus in our space unit; no matter that the joke gets told 10x a class, it never gets old!
    now this just adds to an untouchable classic.

    i just wonder if they'll be down with the kelly jive enuf to bust this one out.
  18. solacevip

    solacevip TRIBE Promoter

    "(On R Kelly) He's got a lot of balls. Talkin' bout 'it ain't me'. Got a damn sex tape out; 'it ain't me'. Motherfucker we know what you look like. That's you, ok? There's a damn Soul Train award right next to the bed." - Chris Rock
  19. R-Kelly really is insane. I mean I thought it was an act, but this....this is beyond a smoking gun.
  20. The Truth

    The Truth TRIBE Member

    Innocent Until ... When?
    Five years ago, R&B star R. Kelly was charged with 21 counts of child pornography. His trial has yet to begin.

    May 28, 2007 issue - Janice Forest did a double take as she waited to be seated two weeks ago at the Cadillac Theater in Chicago. It was the opening night of the musical "The Color Purple," and only Chicago's A list were on the red carpet, led by the show's producer, Oprah Winfrey. Somewhere in the procession of Windy City luminaries came R&B star R. Kelly. Kelly, wearing his Sunday-best dark suit, black and white spectator shoes and neatly braided cornrows, worked the crowd with the confidence of a man without a care in the world. Forest just stared at him, in shock. "This is a guy who ought to be in jail in my mind," says Forest, a 43-year-old customer-service rep who lives on the South Side. "How dare he show up at a play about rape like all is forgotten?"

    Kelly may very well believe that's true. Despite being arrested and charged with 21 counts of child pornography in June 2002, Kelly, 41, has yet to stand trial. The Cook County prosecutor's office says that Kelly isn't likely to face a judge any time soon, despite a 26-minute videotape that allegedly shows him having sex with (and urinating on) an underage girl. A bootleg copy, called "Rated R Kelly Triple XXX, Vol. 1," has been a top seller on numerous porn Web sites and inner-city street corners for years. Yet next week, Kelly will release a new album, "Double Up." It's his third CD—since his arrest.

    How did this happen? Some of the delays were caused by legitimate, if slightly bizarre, reasons, including Kelly's burst appendix and a judge who hurt himself falling off a ladder. Kelly's lawyers have maintained all along that it is not the singer in the video, despite the uncanny resemblance. "This is a cloud over his head as well," says Allan Mayer, the singer's spokesperson. "No one wants this over more than Mr. Kelly." But he's not acting like a man in a hurry to clear his name. Kelly's lawyers have always had the option of invoking the speedy trial rule that mandates the case begin in four months or be dropped. They never have. Shauna Boliker, the head of the Cook County state's attorney's Sex Crime Unit, says the last five years have been filled with endless legal maneuvers. "His lawyers have filed 25 to 30 motions, and that's just not the norm in any case," says Boliker. "And the people who are really suffering are the victims." Those victims may be the real reason for Kelly's nonrush to judgment. People knowledgeable about the case, who don't want to be identified because the trial hasn't begun, say they think Kelly and his lawyers are stalling until the young girls become adults, when they'll be less sympathetic victims—and, in the case of the girl in the video, less recognizable. (Kelly's lawyer did not return calls for comment.) Many Kelly watchers also believe that the case hasn't moved faster because of racial factors. "If those girls had been white, he'd be in jail now," says Shakema Long, 18, a coed at Cal State. "But they were black girls, and nobody cares about us."

    You'd think that the state would have a strong case. Kelly had a well-known interest in minors. In 1994, he illegally married the singer Aaliyah when she was 15 and he was 28. Kelly has reportedly been sued four times by women who claimed some type of sexual misconduct; Kelly is believed to have settled all of the cases for unspecified amounts. Some people say there were other incidents as well. "A lot of people knew what was going on and chose to look the other way," says one of Kelly's former employees, who admits to being one of those people. "He wasn't doing this without help."

    But Kelly is too busy to take a spin on the wheels of justice. In addition to his new album, he's made guest appearances on several others, and he just wrote a tribute song, "Rise Up," for the students of Virginia Tech. (Does that note of compassion sound strange? It shouldn't. Two of Kelly's best-known songs are the inspirational "I Believe I Can Fly" and the lewd "I Like the Crotch on You." Mr. Kelly is a complicated man.) The single he recorded with Snoop, "That's That S--t," just hit No. 1 on the R&B charts. (It's one of his profane songs.) Snoop doesn't think a cloud of suspicion should rain on anyone's career. "You're innocent until proven guilty in this country, so I can't judge him," he says. At the rate his case is going, Kelly could remain unjudged for a long, long time.

    Clarification: In the article, "When Will R. Kelly's Child Porn Trial Begin" (Arts, 5/28/07), we reported a comment from the head of the Cook County Sex Crime Unit that "the people who are really suffering [from the delay in Kelly's criminal trial] are the victims." While there have been other allegations concerning Kelly's sexual conduct with young women, the open Cook County criminal case involves only one alleged victim. In that case, Kelly faces 14 charges involving child pornography; in 2004, prosecutors dropped seven of the original charges.

  21. Michlerish

    Michlerish Well-Known TRIBEr


    yeah, and the fact that he's a celebrity with money has nothing to do with it.
  22. Flashy_McFlash

    Flashy_McFlash Well-Known TRIBEr

    The only way this could be better is if it were called 'Sex Panther'.
  23. DigitalMP

    DigitalMP TRIBE Member

    I was at Toko Sushi last weekend and they played R Kelly's "Sex Me" (followed by Shai - If I Ever Fall (in Love))
  24. Rajio

    Rajio Well-Known TRIBEr

    wow .... wow.
    :confused: :rolleyes: :eek: :D :(
  25. Bernnie Federko

    Bernnie Federko TRIBE Member

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