1. Hi Guest: Welcome to TRIBE, Toronto's largest and longest running online community. If you'd like to post here, or reply to existing posts on TRIBE, you first have to register on the forum. You can register with your facebook ID or with an email address. Join us!

Marriage prep classes

Discussion in 'Girl Stuff Forum' started by KillaLadY, Jun 29, 2010.

  1. KillaLadY

    KillaLadY TRIBE Member

    I am really interested in taking these classes (obviously not alone lol), but I really don't want anything that has any religion imprinted on it.

    I'm more interested in classes that provide an outlook about communication, understanding, etc etc - as I feel it's almost necessary to have this before a couple embarks in this journey.

    Does anyone know of any good places that can be recommended? Anyone did any of these classes, are they worth it?
  2. Big Harv

    Big Harv TRIBE Member

    There's a very good book (Canadian author/marriage counsellor) called The Ten Conversations You Must Have before getting married.

    It talks about means of communicating and covers all of the big things that come up in a marriage: kids, religion, finances, housework, sex, leisure time

    It mainly confirmed that we were on the same page and meant for each other but also exposed some differences of opinion in certain areas that weren't dealbreakers but we're working at reconciling.
  3. jus me

    jus me TRIBE Member

    Sounds like this book: 7 conversations by Sue Johnson which I've been meaning to get!
    Last edited: Jun 29, 2010
  4. acheron

    acheron TRIBE Member

    yes but it includes 3 more conversations!

    Marriage is all about conversations apparently.
  5. KillaLadY

    KillaLadY TRIBE Member

    You are supposed to talk to your spouse?
  6. acheron

    acheron TRIBE Member

    I know! My wife and I just hold up signs. Thumbs up, thumbs down, dog house, fuck me, fuck you, yes, no, it's the dog's fault. stuff like that.
  7. Wiseman

    Wiseman TRIBE Member

    Guys: Tell her she looks hot on the regular (not pretty or beautiful, HOT!)
    Girls: Surprise BJs on the regular.

    Did I leave anything out?
  8. ScottBentley

    ScottBentley TRIBE Member

    yes, Anal.
  9. mingster

    mingster TRIBE Member

    most marriage/relationship counsellors can provide you with marriage prep "classes".

    if you can get past the 'counsellor/therapist' title, they're really just someone to facilitate the conversation and cover the topics.
  10. KillaLadY

    KillaLadY TRIBE Member

    Well, I got THAT covered. lol
  11. KillaLadY

    KillaLadY TRIBE Member

    I think I feel a little "intimidated" by the therapist title, yes. Plus, I know for a fact my fiancee will not feel too comfortable with that. - "we don't have issues, we don't need to see a therapist." - he will most likely say.

    I've read some books, and we encourage eachother to communicate at all times - we have a great relationship (something I never believed I would actually have with any man), but just like any relationship, we both feel we aren't mature enough to properly handle certain arguments and our styles and pasts are very different, with different baggage and arguments sometimes tend to get out of control and we both know we are at fault.

    I feel that a class is beneficial (or maybe a book) or maybe someone has a better advice, because I feel that it's important to be comfortable with eachother when solving issues.

    I know there have been a lot of marriages, engagements, etc on this board... So if anyone has any suggestions, advice, etc etc things that you both have done to best prepare and support eachother, that would be really really really appreciated. :)
  12. MissBlu

    MissBlu TRIBE Member

    not to invade your thread or anything, but i think what you are looking for is a counsellor or therapist. in your post you mention that you have arguments that get out of control and you both know you're at fault, imo that sounds like an issue.

    if you don't want to go your religious, that you're probably looking for a counsellor (maybe counsellor is easier to swallow then therapist).

    books are great, but sometimes it really helps to have someone on the outside.
  13. KillaLadY

    KillaLadY TRIBE Member

    I agree and I really appreciate your reply, not invading the thread at all - I posted it because I am definitely seeking advice. :)

    How do I present this idea so it doesn't sound too "threatening"?
  14. basketballjones

    basketballjones TRIBE Member

    werent you already married?
  15. basketballjones

    basketballjones TRIBE Member

    steak and anal day ;)

  16. KillaLadY

    KillaLadY TRIBE Member

    I converted to muslim religion, therefore I decided to have more than one husband.
  17. basketballjones

    basketballjones TRIBE Member

    that doesnt even make sense
  18. WestsideWax

    WestsideWax TRIBE Promoter

    ...as something that's important to you and something you believe will be very valuable to your pending marriage. Point out your blowout arguments, how they make you feel and explain that you'd like to have a long and lasting marriage based on open and honest communication - it really is the cornerstone of any good relationship. If he balks, then go on your own, as it will still be of benefit to the two of you.
  19. MissBlu

    MissBlu TRIBE Member

  20. KillaLadY

    KillaLadY TRIBE Member

    Very good advice.

    That is exactly how I will position it - thank you very much for your reply. :)
  21. WestsideWax

    WestsideWax TRIBE Promoter

    You're quite welcome! I'm in my second year of marriage, and speak from personal experience. Also feel free to PM me if you need names to look into.
  22. Sal De Ban

    Sal De Ban TRIBE Member

    this was funny
  23. Aerius Zension

    Aerius Zension TRIBE Member

    How can you conversate when you have a steak in your mouth and she is bj'ing in her mouth?

    Conversation is overrated.
  24. acheron

    acheron TRIBE Member

    Steak and Anal. She can still talk, he just has to nod in agreement. This is why Jo is well-positioned for a long and successful marriage. It's all about communication.
  25. KillaLadY

    KillaLadY TRIBE Member

    hahaha "well positioned" lol

Share This Page