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Discussion in 'TRIBE Main Forum' started by kyfe, Feb 5, 2002.

  1. kyfe

    kyfe TRIBE Member

    Beijing (SatireWire.com) — Bitter after being snubbed for membership in the "Axis of Evil," Libya, China, and Syria today announced they had formed the "Axis of Just as Evil," which they said would be way eviler than that stupid Iran-Iraq-North Korea axis President Bush warned of his State of the Union address.

    Axis of Evil members, however, immediately dismissed the new axis as having, for starters, a really dumb name. "Right. They are Just as Evil... in their dreams!" declared North Korean leader Kim Jong-il. "Everybody knows we're the best evils... best at being evil... we're the best."

    Diplomats from Syria denied they were jealous over being excluded, although they conceded they did ask if they could join the Axis of Evil.

    "They told us it was full," said Syrian President Bashar al-Assad.

    "An Axis can't have more than three countries," explained Iraqi President Saddam Hussein. "This is not my rule, it's tradition. In World War II you had Germany, Italy, and Japan in the evil Axis. So you can only have three. And a secret handshake. Ours is wicked cool."


    International reaction to Bush's Axis of Evil declaration was swift, as within minutes, France surrendered.

    Elsewhere, peer-conscious nations rushed to gain triumvirate status in what became a game of geopolitical chairs. Cuba, Sudan, and Serbia said they had formed the Axis of Somewhat Evil, forcing Somalia to join with Uganda and Myanmar in the Axis of Occasionally Evil, while Bulgaria, Indonesia and Russia established the Axis of Not So Much Evil Really As Just Generally Disagreeable.

    With the criteria suddenly expanded and all the desirable clubs filling up, Sierra Leone, El Salvador, and Rwanda applied to be called the Axis of Countries That Aren't the Worst But Certainly Won't Be Asked to Host the Olympics; Canada, Mexico, and Australia formed the Axis of Nations That Are Actually Quite Nice But Secretly Have Nasty Thoughts About America, while Spain, Scotland, and New Zealand established the Axis of Countries That Be Allowed to Ask Sheep to Wear Lipstick.

    "That's not a threat, really, just something we like to do," said Scottish Executive First Minister Jack McConnell.

    While wondering if the other nations of the world weren't perhaps making fun of him, a cautious Bush granted approval for most axes, although he rejected the establishment of the Axis of Countries Whose Names End in "Guay," accusing one of its members of filing a false application. Officials from Paraguay, Uruguay, and Chadguay denied the charges.

    Israel, meanwhile, insisted it didn't want to join any Axis, but privately, world leaders said that's only because no one asked them.

  2. kodos

    kodos TRIBE Member

  3. Rosey

    Rosey TRIBE Member

    now that is funny stuff.
  4. Subsonic Chronic

    Subsonic Chronic TRIBE Member

    Gold! [​IMG]

  5. janiecakes

    janiecakes TRIBE Member

    haha too funny!
  6. Zer0G

    Zer0G TRIBE Member

  7. Klubmasta Will

    Klubmasta Will TRIBE Member

    nice. [​IMG]

    is satirewire.com like theonion.com? i'll have to check it out.
  8. kyfe

    kyfe TRIBE Member

    the two cross over nicely.

  9. H2Whoa

    H2Whoa TRIBE Member

  10. janiecakes

    janiecakes TRIBE Member

  11. Lysistrata

    Lysistrata Well-Known TRIBEr

    This is the first trule funny thing I have read on this board in a really long time. Thank you.

  12. kyfe

    kyfe TRIBE Member

    Thank you I try harder every day to lower the standards of this board, it's hard work I'll have you know. It's nice to finally get some recognition but i'll have you know i couldn't do it alone


    Thank you

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