• Hi Guest: Welcome to TRIBE, the online home of TRIBE MAGAZINE. If you'd like to post here, or reply to existing posts on TRIBE, you first have to register. Join us!

Ketchup Packet vs Pump


TRIBE Member
I need lots of ketchup for my fries, and so, when at McDonalds (et al) I usually just pump a huge wad of the shit onto my tray and eat it from there

(pumping the ketchup directly onto the fries is too messy and pumping it into those stupid little cups seems like a waste of time)

So anyways, at the mall, the stupid food court places dont have a ketchup pumpy thing and so they give you stupid little ketchup packets.

They give me 3 of them, as if somehow that that should be enough. Hello? One packet is enough to ketchupify like 3 fries, max. WTF? Why don't those ketchup packs come a bit bigger?

The only time those ketchup packets are useful, is when they contain liquor (such as Konyagi) or other such discrete intoxicants. Tres convenient.

Alex D. from TRIBE on Utility Room


Well-Known TRIBEr
I usually walk around with a colostomy bag attached to my hip, filled with Heinz. You just never know when you--or a loved one-- might need a squirt of the red sauce, and it really is a great joy to provide that which is needed, and out of the end of a rubber phallus, no less.


TRIBE Member
Ewww I hate those pump things. My number one reason is they are so un-hygenic. Do you think that "pump" ever gets cleaned. All I can think about are the bug and rodent colonies who live and feed off of it on a daily basis. nasty.

When I get fastfood, even when I'm eating in, I ask for some"to go ketchup" and usually everyone gives it to me no problem.
tribe cannabis accessories silver grinders


TRIBE Member
My high school is home to a unknown true legend in which a student decided to take a dump in the ketchup pump. Then decided to sit at a table in the cafeteria with his friends during lunch to watch the students pump away covering their fries.

Unfortunately, it went unoticed and that the beforehand is true.


Well-Known TRIBEr