Originally posted by el presidente Highsteppa
If you demand respect, you command respect. And you should never compromise about thing. Direct communication can be a good thing, so long as you don't leave yourself exposed. It sounds like a contradiction, but it's actually a tightrope balancing act that requires a lot of judgement. I have been blessed with having some very rewarding and loving relationships because I've taken a zero bullshit policy in my life, and at the same time, I've paid dearly for being so open, direct and honest. And there will be those pigfuckers that will use you to your own advantage, it's sad. But I take comfort that they will answer for thier shit soon enough, as they tend to leave behind a mess that will generally catch up with them, and they also don't think very far beyond tomorrow. I don't ever regret being open and direct, since it allows me to discern a lot quicker as to who is worth my time, and who isn't. You have to give a bit of trust, but they have to earn the rest.
isn't that the truth.
i've kept on being me, often misunderstood, misinterpreted...
and it seems to me, no matter how i am, how honest, how down to earth, how loving, how friendly, how open, how easy to talk to, how mature (in general), how fun and free etc etc etc
i'm always left standing by myself.
with the FEW people in my life that "get me"
my mother, my select friends... and that's it.
which i guess is just great, but there's always room to meet new people....
maybe it's just that people don't take the time to fully understand me- and all that makes up me. as basic one said to me, about 2 1/2 years ago that i have never forgotten "think of the big picture" and i don't think many people do... people don't see the "big picture" of all that there is to being me.
or all that there is to ANYONE
people are so concerned about ME ME ME
and fitting in, and social classes, and initial judgments etc... that they fail to take into account, there is a REAL heart inside those people... that you may overlook they're beautiful and amazing personality because of a simple few things you failed to set aside as "quirks" or something (i dont know?)
i believe in second chances,
i believe in people
but the more i do... the more i realise that there are VERY FEW really REALLY good people out there- and it's so sad...
what have we done to ourselves...?
do we not take the time to admit people ARE people and they aren't perfect? that sometimes you click, sometimes you don't- that you may not be friend perse, but that doesn't mean you can't find a common ground and hold conversation? be able to be mature about shit? my list goes on...what happened to the respect, to the trust?
i leearned this lesson of trust just recently.
someone i trusted, someone i thought was a friend-- no matter how far away we were from each other and how often we *didn't* see each other-- just left me wondering WHAT? WHY? HOW? and i still question it... but what can i do? learn from my mistakes i guess?
i guess i still believe there are generally good mature indivuduals out there- whom when things go off, for whatever reason- can still talk about it and decide to stick it out, or go their seperate ways. i don't like "FUCK IT" attitude that so many people put on their friendships. i do understand that after time and time of dissapointment it's time to get out the ol "fuck it" attitude... but cmon....
where's the love?
the understanding?
the communication?
the respect?
the common courtesy?
the list goes on...
and this internet world of technology can help in some ways, and not in alot. i've found for myself-- lately anywayz-- it's been the deciding factor of my personality. when the truth is.... it takes more than a great person to see past what the internet says f for us and our hearts...
we are who we are
and we're all beautiful.
in our own quirky little ways
anyways i could go on and on about this people subject...
i already have... i'm sure you don't want to hear my rants...
Keep at it Narissa. Given enough time, you will find the guy who will reciprocate the same kind of attitude that you give.
James
i've found a few men that share this attitude
one whom i haven't talked to lately, i wish i had...
i love new friendships. it's always refreshing to meet great people who understand...
and this ex of mine--
he's just not mature enuf to deal with the feelings of his heart.
i know him better than anyone, and he's only hurting himself.
he decided it was better to me my friend, that not have me in life his at all (after 4 months of not speaking) yet-- we hang out, everything is cool, and he doesn't talk to me after... i'm sure i'll get the ol "i've been so busy" shit-- but the truth lies in his heart. its a simple as he cares too much to be my friend. the fact i know in my heart how he feels, that he's said "in so many words" how he does... but FEAR can be a great deciding factor in relationships. oh well. only time will tell...
and in the meantime.
i'm still waiting for someone really amazing to come into my life.
and eventually that will happen.
friends are fabulous.
and so are you JAMES.
thank you for your post.
narissa
