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Getting pushed into Marriage!

G

Guest

Guest
I have been going out with my girlfriend for over 6 years, and I love her. She turned 30 this year I am 27. When ever we meet anyone they always bother me about why I havn't asked the question yet. I am sorry I am not ready to get married. I just finished school, started a new career I really want to have some direction in my life before I commit to marriage. Plus there is the wedding itself, its really expensive probably around $50,000 for the whole event. I believe if you are going to marry someone you should have at least enough money to support them. I don't believe in getting engaged for 5 years just cause you don't know what you are doing.
I would to get married by the age of thirty. Why can't people see that I have certain things I want in life and I am not going to rush into anything.
Am I wrong?
 

pr0nstar

TRIBE Member
Why are you questioning yourself?

Simple as that. If you're not ready ... that's all that matters.

Forget marriage IMO, I mean if you're in love and with the person you love, that's all that matters. $50,00 for what.. your parents/family to celebrate your love?

pr0nstar
 

Ditto Much

TRIBE Member
yes by default you are wrong.


as per the argument, I have 4 older sisters, 2 of them went out with they're boyfriends for about the length that your at. So I wouldn't think about it as normal or not or anyone elses business.
 
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acheron

TRIBE Member
$50,000 for a marriage? What, is she the Princess of Wales?

Weddings don't have to be expensive. If having an expensive wedding matters, then let it be the cost of the parents - you can't be expected to afford it.

My wedding cost less than $7,000, including the cost of her dress and my kilt.

As far as when is concerned, it doesn't matter _when_ so long as you feel you're ready for it. But just remember that having money and a career, etc, don't matter. How does having a better job affect your relationship with your wife? It shouldn't have anything to do with the way you two feel about eachotther. If your relationship has a price tag, then get out now.

The point of a marriage is to a) solidify the bond between husband and wife and b) provide a moderate tax shelter. There are a number of legal advantages as well. But once you're married, it's up to you whether you 'settle down' immediately or not. It's a commitment, and if you're not ready for it then don't even think about it.
 
G

Guest

Guest
<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by acheron:
My wedding cost less than $7,000, including the cost of her dress and my kilt.</font>
Yes!
 
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G

Guest

Guest
I will ignore the insults. My parents are going to pay most of it. We have a very big family and I am the oldest so I think my parents want to go all out when I do get married. The problem I am having is people not minding there own business saying the same shit like so when are you guys getting married. It gets us into fights about where this relationship is going. Which is really annoying!
 

deep

TRIBE Member
Yeah, I bet that your need for attractive women at the clubs despite your girlfriend doesn't help either
 

acheron

TRIBE Member
If people are pressuring you tell them to fuck off! It's not their decision.

If they want a wedding so much then they should get married themselves. - see how they like it! If they're already married, then tell them to get a divorce!

Everytime they start bugging you about marriage, bug them back about divorce - like, "so, why are you guys still together, anyway? I mean, you spend so much time bugging me about my relationship, is there any time for your own? Give up now!"
 
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dancechick

TRIBE Member
i understand what you are saying. i have been with my boyfriend for only a year and a half and people are bugging us about getting married.
and has anyone else notice how many people are getting married or engaged right now?
i agree with pest about wanting to be settled in life before getting married. i would like to have a career established etc. just ignore what people say and smile.
 

Plato

TRIBE Member
<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by JayIsBored:
ok the sausage thing has gone the way of all your base in a quarter of the time thanks to kenny
</font>
note: this is not an invitation to merge the animated gif of "all your base" with sausages.

p[l]a+0
 

Hi i'm God

TRIBE Member
Pfft My wedding consisting of TWO seperate receptions and total of 500 people AND a two week honeymoon to Portugal/Spain Cost about 18G's WTF is with 50?!?!?
 

Plato

TRIBE Member
the cost of pest's wedding is high cause its obviously going to be in ibiza, far away from sausage parties. and paul oakenfold has to eat doesnt he?

pussy trance = pussy party

p[l]a+0
 
G

Guest

Guest
My cousin is getting married in July.
500 people food and alcoholic drinks
$75.00 per person = $37,500
Thats not even including rental of the banquet hall.
Wedding dress $1000 - $2000
3 Limo's $600
Honeymoon Vacation $3,000
We are already up to $45,000 and we haven't included the pictures, flowers, hall rental, dj. So I don't think $50,000 is that much out of line. Unless I want to have a quarter chicken dinner wedding in a community cente I think that is what it will cost!
 
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SUNKIST

TRIBE Member
<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by Tearer:
Yes!</font>
i concur...big ups to the scottish massif insiiiiiiiiide!

my wedding is gonna cost millions, i hope my dad has started saving.

forget being surprised pest has a GF..im surprised at the amount of people engaged/married on the board.
 

graham

Well-Known TRIBEr
you're in luck, technically her parents are supposed to pick up the tab. Unless they can't, in which case you're fucked. You shouldn't even worry about it, even if you do get married, the only responsibilities you (are allowed to) have when it comes to the wedding are to show up on-time, in a tuxedo. That's it, just a guy in a suit. Weddings have less to do with the people getting married, than the respective mothers of the bride (1st) and groom (2nd).
 

Fir3start3r

TRIBE Member
Woah....$50,000????
What....are you guys Italian or something??
(Nothing against Italians; my wife's Godmother is Italian, very nice lady)
I've been to a large Italian wedding, it's nice and all but I could never justify spending that much.
And we certainly were NOT going to pay for other peoples' dinners at the end of the wedding just because "it's the norm".
The most important part of the wedding was the ceremony itself, the rest is just a party...
I too wore a kilt! wOO!

After the wedding, we had a private party at a small Scottish/Irish pub (we arranged for finger foods on both ends of the pub) and that was it.
We had gift openings at a friends place.
Simple.
You don't want to start your life off with thousands of dollars in debt! We definately understand that logic.
My wife didn't even wear white. After much research we found that white only became popular after Queen Victoria's own wedding.
(As a side note we also found that weddings weren't done in church, weddings were done in the father-of-the-bride's backyard and then they'd go to church to have the bond blessed)
It didn't even cost us a couple of grand and for what?
An absolutely great time that everyone still remembers...
 

Temper Tantrum

TRIBE Member
You don't need to attach labels to your love to satisfy anyone else. After all your both in love and your happy so why does it matter what everyone else wants or thinks? It's YOUR life. If/when your ready, fine, but obviously you don't feel the need now.

You can't live your life for others


Big ups to the kilt wearing massive!

I personally don't want a big wedding, I want to elope and get married on a beach in tahiti somewhere. If I ever find someone that will put up with me


~allie~
 
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