OK, some of these terms made me piss myself - bloody Brit slang.....
Some are familiar but some are new to me - enjoy!
New Slang Dictionary...
AEROPLANE BLONDE
One who has bleached/dyed her hair but still has a 'black box'.
AUSSIE KISS
Similar to a French Kiss, but given down under.
BADLY PACKED KEBAB
A vulgar (but still excellent) term for the female genitalia.
BEAVER LEAVER
A homosexual.
BEER COAT
The invisible but warm coat worn when walking home after a booze cruise
at 3 in the morning.
BEER COMPASS
The invisible device that ensures your safe arrival home after a booze
cruise, even though you're too pissed to remember where you live, how
you
get there,
and where you've come from.
BEER SCOOTER
The ability to get home after a night out on the booze and not remember
it i.e. 'I don't even remember getting home last night, I must have
caught
the
beer scooter'.
BOBFOC
Body Off Baywatch, Face Off Crimewatch.
BOILER SUIT
The prosecution charge that you did wilfully, and with phallus
aforethought, score with a BOBFOC last night. This charge is usually
brought
by a
kangaroo
court of your friends in the pub on Saturday night.
BONE OF CONTENTION
A hard-on that causes an argument, e.g. one that arises when a man is
watching Olympic beach volleyball on TV with his girlfriend.
BREAKING THE SEAL
Your first piss in the pub, usually after 2 hours of drinking. After
breaking the seal of your bladder, repeat visits to the toilet will be
required
every 10 or 15 minutes for the rest of the night.
BRITNEY SPEARS
Modern Slang for 'beers', e.g. 'Couple of Britneys please, Doreen'.
BRUCE LEE
Erect nipple (as in, a hard Nip).
BUDGIE'S TONGUE OR SMALL MAN IN A BOAT OR TONGUE PUNCHBAG
The female erection.
BUNNY-BOILER
An unhinged and overly possessive woman. From the rabbit boiling scenece
in
the
film
'Fatal Attraction', e.g. 'I don't like the look of that aeroplane
blonde -
could be
a bunny boiler'.
DOUBLE BASS
A sexual position in which the man enters the woman from behind, and
then fiddles with the woman's nipples with one hand and her Budgie's
Tongue
with
the
other. The position is similar to that used when playing a double bass
instrument,
but the sound produced is slightly different.
DRINK-LINK
A modern term for a cashpoint machine (ATM). Named so because it is
common to visit one before going out on the booze.
ETCH-A-SKETCH
Trying to draw a smile on a woman's face by twiddling both of her
nipples simultaneously.
FLOGGING ON
Surfing the Internet for some left-handed websites.
FREE THE TADPOLES
Liberate the residents of Wank Tanks.
FRIGMAROLE
Unnecessarily time-consuming foreplay.
FUCKSHIT FUCKSHIT FUCKSHIT
The sound made when driving through too narrow a gap at too high a
speed.
GOING FOR A McSHIT
Entering a fast food restaurant with no intention of buying food,
you're just going to the bog. If challenged by a pimply staff member,
your
declaration to
them that you'll buy their food afterwards is a McShit With Lies.
GREYHOUND
A very short skirt, only an inch from the hare.
HAND-TO-GLAND COMBAT
A vigorous masturbation session.
JOHNNY-NO-STARS
A young man of substandard intelligence, the typical adolescent who
works in a burger restaurant. The 'no-stars' comes from the badges
displaying
stars that staff at fast-food restaurants often wear to show their level
of
training.
MILLENNIUM DOMES
The contents of a Wonderbra, i.e. extremely impressive when viewed from
the outside, but there's actually fuck-all in there worth seeing.
MONKEY BATH
A bath so hot, that when lowering yourself in, you go: 'Oo! Oo! Oo!
Aa!Aa! Aa!'.
MUMBLER
An attractive girl in tight shorts or jeans, etc. i.e. you can see the
'lips' moving but can't quite make out what they're saying.
MYSTERY BUS
The bus that arrives at the pub on Friday night while you're in the
toilet after your 10th pint, and whisks away all the unattractive people
so
the pub
is suddenly packed with stunners when you come back in.
MYSTERY TAXI
The taxi that arrives at your place on Saturday morning before you wake
up, whisks away the stunner you slept with, and leaves a 10-Pinter in
your
bed
instead.
NBR (No Beers Required)
Someone that you'd chat up instantly in the pub. The opposite of a
10-Pinter.
NELSON MANDELA
Rhyming Slang for 'Stella' (the lager).
ONE IN THE DEPARTURE LOUNGE
The need to defecate imminently.
PEARL HARBOUR
Cold (weather). An example of it would be - 'It's a bit Pearl Harbour
out there!'
Meaning - there's a nasty 'nip' in the air.
PICASSO ARSE
A woman whose knickers are too small for her, so she looks like she's
got 4 buttocks.
RAGMAN'S COAT
Untidy and unkempt pubic hair e.g. 'That mumbler looks quite fit but I
bet she's got a kebab like a ragmans coat !'
RELEASE A CHOCOLATE HOSTAGE
To defecate e.g. ' I've got one in the departure lounge, so I'm just
nipping out to release a chocolate hostage'.
SALAD DODGER
An excellent phrase for an overweight person.
SKIN-CHIMNEY - see BADLY PACKED KEBAB
SPERM WAIL OR SPUEPHEMISM
A verbal outburst during the male orgasm.
STARSHIP TROOPER OR ARSETRONAUT
A homosexual.
SWAMP-DONKEY
A deeply unattractive woman.
TART FUEL or BITCH PISS
Bottled Alcopops, e.g. Hooch, regularly consumed by young women.
TEN-PINTER
Someone that you'd only chat up after drinking at least 10 pints.
TITANIC
A lady who goes down first time out.
TODGER DODGER
A lesbian.
TWO-BAGGER OR DOUBLE BAGGER
Someone that you'd need 2 paper bags to have sex with (1 to cover their
head, and 1 to cover yours, in case their bag falls off).
UP ON BLOCKS
Menstruating i.e. out of action, a bit like a car in a garage. e.g. 'I
don't think I'll be in luck tonight lads, the missus is up on blocks'.
VAGINA DECLINER
A homosexual.
WALLACE AND GROMIT
Rhyming Slang for 'vomit'.
WANK SEANCE
During a masturbation session, the eerie feeling that you're being
watched with disgust by your dead relatives.
WYNONA RYDER
Rhyming Slang for 'cider'. e.g. 'Pint of Wynona, half a Nelson and a
bottle of tart fuel please Doreen'.
X-PILES
Unwanted visitors from Uranus.
d
Some are familiar but some are new to me - enjoy!
New Slang Dictionary...
AEROPLANE BLONDE
One who has bleached/dyed her hair but still has a 'black box'.
AUSSIE KISS
Similar to a French Kiss, but given down under.
BADLY PACKED KEBAB
A vulgar (but still excellent) term for the female genitalia.
BEAVER LEAVER
A homosexual.
BEER COAT
The invisible but warm coat worn when walking home after a booze cruise
at 3 in the morning.
BEER COMPASS
The invisible device that ensures your safe arrival home after a booze
cruise, even though you're too pissed to remember where you live, how
you
get there,
and where you've come from.
BEER SCOOTER
The ability to get home after a night out on the booze and not remember
it i.e. 'I don't even remember getting home last night, I must have
caught
the
beer scooter'.
BOBFOC
Body Off Baywatch, Face Off Crimewatch.
BOILER SUIT
The prosecution charge that you did wilfully, and with phallus
aforethought, score with a BOBFOC last night. This charge is usually
brought
by a
kangaroo
court of your friends in the pub on Saturday night.
BONE OF CONTENTION
A hard-on that causes an argument, e.g. one that arises when a man is
watching Olympic beach volleyball on TV with his girlfriend.
BREAKING THE SEAL
Your first piss in the pub, usually after 2 hours of drinking. After
breaking the seal of your bladder, repeat visits to the toilet will be
required
every 10 or 15 minutes for the rest of the night.
BRITNEY SPEARS
Modern Slang for 'beers', e.g. 'Couple of Britneys please, Doreen'.
BRUCE LEE
Erect nipple (as in, a hard Nip).
BUDGIE'S TONGUE OR SMALL MAN IN A BOAT OR TONGUE PUNCHBAG
The female erection.
BUNNY-BOILER
An unhinged and overly possessive woman. From the rabbit boiling scenece
in
the
film
'Fatal Attraction', e.g. 'I don't like the look of that aeroplane
blonde -
could be
a bunny boiler'.
DOUBLE BASS
A sexual position in which the man enters the woman from behind, and
then fiddles with the woman's nipples with one hand and her Budgie's
Tongue
with
the
other. The position is similar to that used when playing a double bass
instrument,
but the sound produced is slightly different.
DRINK-LINK
A modern term for a cashpoint machine (ATM). Named so because it is
common to visit one before going out on the booze.
ETCH-A-SKETCH
Trying to draw a smile on a woman's face by twiddling both of her
nipples simultaneously.
FLOGGING ON
Surfing the Internet for some left-handed websites.
FREE THE TADPOLES
Liberate the residents of Wank Tanks.
FRIGMAROLE
Unnecessarily time-consuming foreplay.
FUCKSHIT FUCKSHIT FUCKSHIT
The sound made when driving through too narrow a gap at too high a
speed.
GOING FOR A McSHIT
Entering a fast food restaurant with no intention of buying food,
you're just going to the bog. If challenged by a pimply staff member,
your
declaration to
them that you'll buy their food afterwards is a McShit With Lies.
GREYHOUND
A very short skirt, only an inch from the hare.
HAND-TO-GLAND COMBAT
A vigorous masturbation session.
JOHNNY-NO-STARS
A young man of substandard intelligence, the typical adolescent who
works in a burger restaurant. The 'no-stars' comes from the badges
displaying
stars that staff at fast-food restaurants often wear to show their level
of
training.
MILLENNIUM DOMES
The contents of a Wonderbra, i.e. extremely impressive when viewed from
the outside, but there's actually fuck-all in there worth seeing.
MONKEY BATH
A bath so hot, that when lowering yourself in, you go: 'Oo! Oo! Oo!
Aa!Aa! Aa!'.
MUMBLER
An attractive girl in tight shorts or jeans, etc. i.e. you can see the
'lips' moving but can't quite make out what they're saying.
MYSTERY BUS
The bus that arrives at the pub on Friday night while you're in the
toilet after your 10th pint, and whisks away all the unattractive people
so
the pub
is suddenly packed with stunners when you come back in.
MYSTERY TAXI
The taxi that arrives at your place on Saturday morning before you wake
up, whisks away the stunner you slept with, and leaves a 10-Pinter in
your
bed
instead.
NBR (No Beers Required)
Someone that you'd chat up instantly in the pub. The opposite of a
10-Pinter.
NELSON MANDELA
Rhyming Slang for 'Stella' (the lager).
ONE IN THE DEPARTURE LOUNGE
The need to defecate imminently.
PEARL HARBOUR
Cold (weather). An example of it would be - 'It's a bit Pearl Harbour
out there!'
Meaning - there's a nasty 'nip' in the air.
PICASSO ARSE
A woman whose knickers are too small for her, so she looks like she's
got 4 buttocks.
RAGMAN'S COAT
Untidy and unkempt pubic hair e.g. 'That mumbler looks quite fit but I
bet she's got a kebab like a ragmans coat !'
RELEASE A CHOCOLATE HOSTAGE
To defecate e.g. ' I've got one in the departure lounge, so I'm just
nipping out to release a chocolate hostage'.
SALAD DODGER
An excellent phrase for an overweight person.
SKIN-CHIMNEY - see BADLY PACKED KEBAB
SPERM WAIL OR SPUEPHEMISM
A verbal outburst during the male orgasm.
STARSHIP TROOPER OR ARSETRONAUT
A homosexual.
SWAMP-DONKEY
A deeply unattractive woman.
TART FUEL or BITCH PISS
Bottled Alcopops, e.g. Hooch, regularly consumed by young women.
TEN-PINTER
Someone that you'd only chat up after drinking at least 10 pints.
TITANIC
A lady who goes down first time out.
TODGER DODGER
A lesbian.
TWO-BAGGER OR DOUBLE BAGGER
Someone that you'd need 2 paper bags to have sex with (1 to cover their
head, and 1 to cover yours, in case their bag falls off).
UP ON BLOCKS
Menstruating i.e. out of action, a bit like a car in a garage. e.g. 'I
don't think I'll be in luck tonight lads, the missus is up on blocks'.
VAGINA DECLINER
A homosexual.
WALLACE AND GROMIT
Rhyming Slang for 'vomit'.
WANK SEANCE
During a masturbation session, the eerie feeling that you're being
watched with disgust by your dead relatives.
WYNONA RYDER
Rhyming Slang for 'cider'. e.g. 'Pint of Wynona, half a Nelson and a
bottle of tart fuel please Doreen'.
X-PILES
Unwanted visitors from Uranus.
