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Employers Talking Down to You

grounded4life

TRIBE Member
What's your take on this? Have you ever had one of your employers talk down to you for things that are out of your control? frankly, I'm tired of it and am wondering if I should open my mouth about it. I'm sick of this one woman (happens to be a partner in the firm I work for) always talking down to me for things that I can't help.

Sorry the person didn't leave a number even though I requested that they do so (twice) or leave a voice mail. Like come on. Who are you? She's probably the worst dressed person in the office, looks like Mr. Ed, and the most disliked person I can think of here. I really feel like I should say something to her. But at the same time I don't want to be unprofessional either.

Help?
 

evil homer

TRIBE Member
don't be unprofessional - it will only encourage the condescension.
suck it up and bitch to your friends after work and be careful that one day you don't end up just like her.
 

416

TRIBE Member
I frequently talk down to people in the office who I consider lesser then me. It makes me feel like a big man.
 

litespeed

Well-Known TRIBEr
I would freak out on her next time she does it.. point out what she is doing and ask why she is picking on you for things that have nothing to do with you.
 

Sunshyne Jones

TRIBE Member
whew ... well, depending on the person and the way your office runs, speaking up could be what they call a "career limiting move". :)

couple of questions:
what is your position
is this person your manager?
if not, have you discussed this with your manager? can you discuss with your manager in confidence and ask for some advice on how best to handle this person?

personally i find it hard to take when someone is condescending to me, and i WANT to speak up. but you have to pick your battles. if it's happening over and over again, though, it probably won't stop unless you find a way to encourage this person to stop talking to you this way. creative ways to do it may be to get on a project with that person or run by that person and wow her ... have your mgr put in a subtle good word for you to help you out. if you have to go direct, then definitely don't do it in front of anyone else (considered undermining the person's authority etc.) ... maybe ask for a meeting with her, ask if you can have a frank discussion about your performance and present your case?

just because someone is a partner doesn't mean they should be able to speak to you that way. However, there are people who do that regardless of their position and it's a tough one, trying to make them stop.
 
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smile

TRIBE Member
did you forget to put the covers on your TPS reports?

i'll see that you get another copy of that memo, mmmmkay? greeeeat.
 

DEEPHOUSEGRL

TRIBE Member
Don't put up with it. Tell them once that you don't need to be talked down to, and that you'll respond better if she speaks to you in a different tone. If that doesn't work.....then find another job. Nobody needs to be disrespected by employers when you're working for their own profit!!
 

deevah

TRIBE Member
depends on the type of personality she is....some ppl don't respect anyone until they fight back....

i have a co-worker like that - she's the top sales person in the copy, has extreme potty-mouth, is your stereotypical new yorker...the last person that supported her got ran over on a daily basis...when i took over that position, she tried the same thing w/ me and i pushed back and she doesn't try her attitude w/ me...

this person is a partner in the firm so you have to tread lightly...if she treats EVERYONE this way then there's not much you can do..if she's singling (sp? wtf, i just can get it to look right) you out, then u need to chat w/ her
 

the_fornicator

TRIBE Member
ask them.

"I don't know if you mean it as such, but when you talk to me I get the impression that you're talking down to me. If you have an issue, please be assured that blah blah blah blah"

but I always tend to open my mouth before I think. I dunno, I have this conception that it keeps everybody that I deal with on the same page though people could think I'm a dink and I just don't know.
 

416

TRIBE Member
Originally posted by DEEPHOUSEGRL
Don't put up with it. Tell them once that you don't need to be talked down to, and that you'll respond better if she speaks to you in a different tone. If that doesn't work.....then find another job. Nobody needs to be disrespected by employers when you're working for their own profit!!
That's not true. What do you do with people who are too stupid to learn things for themselves, yet too smart to fuck up the tasks assigned to them?

The answer is talking down to them. You make them hate you so much that they leave.
 
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Hawk Eye

TRIBE Member
I'd just swallow my pride and take it. i had a boss who was like that and even if i did talk to him he wouldn't care. Just look for another job if it's getting to you. That's what i did.
 

416

TRIBE Member
Originally posted by Hawk Eye
I'd just swallow my pride and take it. i had a boss who was like that and even if i did talk to him he wouldn't care. Just look for another job if it's getting to you. That's what i did.
See! It works.
 

Chris

Well-Known TRIBEr
Originally posted by Hawk Eye
I'd just swallow my pride and take it. i had a boss who was like that and even if i did talk to him he wouldn't care. Just look for another job if it's getting to you. That's what i did.
True, we all have bad days, and lets face it, some of us are not the most effective people persons. Often your going to find conflict in the office place. Its your ability to deal with it, effectively in a professional manner that will set you apart. At the same time you shouldn't be someone's punching bag or doormat.

Besides being a bad "dressor" is she hawt?
 

junglegirl

TRIBE Member
I once had someone tell me I didnt deserve to take a lunch

and I once walked in on my boss talking PURE SHIT about me...after she saw I was a little shaken up and asked me what my problem was. I was like "I just walked in on you talking about me" and shes like I own this company I can do whatever I want...blah blah blah

beyatch
 
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Sunshyne Jones

TRIBE Member
Originally posted by junglegirl
I once had someone tell me I didnt deserve to take a lunch

and I once walked in on my boss talking PURE SHIT about me...after she saw I was a little shaken up and asked me what my problem was. I was like "I just walked in on you talking about me" and shes like I own this company I can do whatever I want...blah blah blah

beyatch

i wouldn't be working at a place with a boss like that for very long.
 

Jeremy Jive

TRIBE Member
That was the daily life at my old job and it wore me right now. It turned me into a nasty person because I hated every day knowing was in store and what would come again on Monday. The only regret I have was not telling him off when I left.

But I got sweet revenge in the end when they whole department resigned in under a month.

The funniest part was he went blabbing in an article in the post about how great their company was at treating and keeping employees happy and on staff. I guess the fact checker never looked into why there are so many empty chairs.

jeremy -so long sucker- jive
 

junglegirl

TRIBE Member
this was two different places...
Ive worked at some sweatshops....well known companies too

I got into a fight with my old boss because I acted a tiny bit surprised when I found out she went to area two....
she freaked out and told me off.....she was like what you think i'm too old!! yelling at me...on the monday after that she took me in her office and said to me "I dont judge you cuz you dont shop at Holt Renfrew:eek:" so rude...I was like just cuz I dont shop at places like Holts doesnt mean my shirt didnt cost $100 bucks too - BITCH!

needless to say I left shortly after.....
 

Klubmasta Will

TRIBE Member
take consolation in the fact that rudeness is a small person's imitation of power.

i wouldn't sweat it but, hey, if it bugs you that much, tell her to go sit on it.
 

Sunshyne Jones

TRIBE Member
Originally posted by junglegirl
this was two different places...
Ive worked at some sweatshops....well known companies too

I got into a fight with my old boss because I acted a tiny bit surprised when I found out she went to area two....
she freaked out and told me off.....she was like what you think i'm too old!! yelling at me...on the monday after that she took me in her office and said to me "I dont judge you cuz you dont shop at Holt Renfrew:eek:" so rude...I was like just cuz I dont shop at places like Holts doesnt mean my shirt didnt cost $100 bucks too - BITCH!

needless to say I left shortly after.....
yeesh. craziness.
 
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wayne kenoff

TRIBE Member
in my experience you have to fight for respect in the workplace. shit rolls downhill. just make sure you know what you're talking about, and make a stand from time to time.

unless you're badly in debt and need the money to make rent, who fucking cares if you lose your job? some things are worth getting fired for, and your self respect is one of them. the other things are poontang and lsd in the coffee pot.
 

choko

TRIBE Member
i just quit a job because the employer kept talking to me like was an idiot, even though i am more experienced than she.
 

junglegirl

TRIBE Member
yeah ive worked for some CRAZY LADIES!!!

the same bitch had me go through her agenda book to write down all her numbers for her and she had all her psychiatric notes written it it.....buhahahaha so funny

shit like - I am pretty, I am nice, I am important, and on and on and on....

god what a case!

edit: I much prefer working for a man!
 

solgrabber

TRIBE Member
next time she tries that shit tell her to go fuck herself in which ever way you want to. make sure you do your work and hope she is not banging the boss so you do not get canned. never let anyone treat you like shit no matter if you are at work or not. i notice this a lot in this country and to be honest if it did occur in any other country (europe especially) she would have a few black eyes at least.

lates,

c
 
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