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COLBERt Rips US Media and Bush Administration... right in front of Bush and Co.!

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deafplayer

TRIBE Member
I wasn't sure if this was 'real' at first...

There are pictures of Colbert on C-SPAN's very own site:
http://inside.c-spanarchives.org:8080/cspan/cspan.csp?command=dprogram&record=157667909

President Bush’s presentation included an impersonator, Steve Bridges, who “interpreted” the president’s remarks for laymen. Following the president, comedian Stephen Colbert made humorous remarks about various current events and the relationship between the press and the White House. He also presented a video of a mock press conference which ended in a chase scene featuring long-time correspondent Helen Thomas.


He was on right after the president?!

well anyway yeah same reaction here..... fantastic... I love how the audience was often... not amused, shall we say..


edit: btw for you people who very rightly HATE STREAMING... here you can just download the video straight, like a human being:
http://www.crooksandliars.com/2006/04/29.html#a8104
 
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deafplayer

TRIBE Member
Its high time your consistent support for so-called "streaming" media be brought into the light of public scrutiny

Go ahead!

Tell us why streaming isnt the single worst possible activity humans have used computers to accomplish
 

SellyCat

TRIBE Member
deafplayer said:
Its high time your consistent support for so-called "streaming" media be brought into the light of public scrutiny

Go ahead!

Tell us why streaming isnt the single worst possible activity humans have used computers to accomplish
I'd rather stuff you into a pickling jar--feet first--and then attach you to a pain mixer.

How's that?
 

deafplayer

TRIBE Member
a PAIN mixer!

what a lucky typo...

Your surrealist threats of violence make it claer there is no point in discussing this further with you
I do not argue with terrorists, or their supporters, including supporters of streaming media
 

SellyCat

TRIBE Member
deafplayer said:
a PAIN mixer!

what a lucky typo...

Your surrealist threats of violence make it claer there is no point in discussing this further with you
I do not argue with terrorists, or their supporters, including supporters of streaming media
I will digitise you and put you on the internet in the form of a streaming video...realplayer format, just out of spite.

The masses will be able to watch you IMMEDIATELY WHENEVER THEY WANT without going through the mindlessly tedious and time consuming PREHISTORIC ritual of "downloading", when what they REALLY want is the instant gratification of watching you right away.

If you had your way, people would be deliberately PROHIBITED from EVER getting anything they want EVER, because your huge and unweildly government bureaucracy aims to make people WAIT in order to get what they want, instead of just being happy by getting what they want when they want it...

And you call ME, a terrorist!?!?! Isn't that like the Orange calling the Carrot orange?
 
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Ditto Much

TRIBE Member
SellyCat said:
And you call ME, a terrorist!?!?! Isn't that like the Orange calling the Carrot orange?

And the angel of the lord came unto me, snatching me up from my place of slumber. And took me on high, and higher still until we moved to the spaces betwixt the air itself. And he brought me into a vast farmlands of our own midwest. And as we descended, cries of impending doom rose from the soil. One thousand, nay a million voices full of fear. And terror possesed me then. And I begged, "Angel of the Lord, what are these tortured screams?" And the angel said unto me, "These are the cries of the carrots, the cries of the carrots! You see, Reverend Maynard, tomorrow is harvest day and to them it is the holocaust." And I sprang from my slumber drenched in sweat like the tears of one million terrified brothers and roared, "Hear me now, I have seen the light! They have a consciousness, they have a life, they have a soul! Damn you! Let the rabbits wear glasses! Save our brothers!" Can I get an amen? Can I get a hallelujah? Thank you Jesus.
Life feeds on life feeds on life feeds on life feeds on........

This is necessary.

It was daylight when you woke up in your ditch. You looked up at your sky then. That made blue be your color. You had your knife there with you too. When you stood up there was goo all over your clothes. Your hands were sticky. You wiped them on your grass, so now your color was green. Oh Lord, why did everything always have to keep changing like this. You were already getting nervous again. Your head hurt and it rang when you stood up. Your head was almost empty. It always hurt you when you woke up like this. You crawled up out of your ditch onto your gravel road and began to walk, waiting for the rest of your mind to come back to you. You can see the car parked far down the road and you walked toward it. "If God is our Father," you thought, "then Satan must be our cousin." Why didn't anyone else understand these important things? You got to your car and tried all the doors. They were locked. It was a red car and it was new. There was an expensive leather camera case laying on the seat. Out across your field
, you could see two tiny people walking by your woods. You began to walk towards them. Now red was your color and, of course, those little people out there were yours too.
 
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SellyCat

TRIBE Member
Ditto Much said:
And the angel of the lord came unto me, snatching me up from my place of slumber. And took me on high, and higher still until we moved to the spaces betwixt the air itself. And he brought me into a vast farmlands of our own midwest. And as we descended, cries of impending doom rose from the soil. One thousand, nay a million voices full of fear. And terror possesed me then. And I begged, "Angel of the Lord, what are these tortured screams?" And the angel said unto me, "These are the cries of the carrots, the cries of the carrots! You see, Reverend Maynard, tomorrow is harvest day and to them it is the holocaust." And I sprang from my slumber drenched in sweat like the tears of one million terrified brothers and roared, "Hear me now, I have seen the light! They have a consciousness, they have a life, they have a soul! Damn you! Let the rabbits wear glasses! Save our brothers!" Can I get an amen? Can I get a hallelujah? Thank you Jesus.
Life feeds on life feeds on life feeds on life feeds on........

This is necessary.

It was daylight when you woke up in your ditch. You looked up at your sky then. That made blue be your color. You had your knife there with you too. When you stood up there was goo all over your clothes. Your hands were sticky. You wiped them on your grass, so now your color was green. Oh Lord, why did everything always have to keep changing like this. You were already getting nervous again. Your head hurt and it rang when you stood up. Your head was almost empty. It always hurt you when you woke up like this. You crawled up out of your ditch onto your gravel road and began to walk, waiting for the rest of your mind to come back to you. You can see the car parked far down the road and you walked toward it. "If God is our Father," you thought, "then Satan must be our cousin." Why didn't anyone else understand these important things? You got to your car and tried all the doors. They were locked. It was a red car and it was new. There was an expensive leather camera case laying on the seat. Out across your field
, you could see two tiny people walking by your woods. You began to walk towards them. Now red was your color and, of course, those little people out there were yours too.

SHABBAT SHALOM, MOTHER FUCKER!!!!!
 

soulbrother 10

TRIBE Member
All I can say is WOW. That took balls. Brilliant. He hammered Bush to his face with some amazing dead-on zingers. I'm sure Bush was furious. And the press looked mortified. A masterpiece.
 

praktik

TRIBE Member
DEAFPLAYER!!

I'm callin you out bitch!

THIS streaming video (middle of page) is the only evidence I need to PROVE, 100%, without a shadow of a doubt, that humankind has not only benefited from streaming video, it has been blessed with streaming video!

[quivers with joy at sound defeat of deafplayer]
 

Lurker

TRIBE Member
That was awesome. Dubya laughed alone like a good sport though. Maybe he didn't get all the jokes?

Has anyone physically seen or heard from Colbert since then? He didn't get fitted for concrete boots because of this, did he? :)

The delivery was stellar. So deadpan and cutty
 
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man_slut

TRIBE Member
praktik said:
DEAFPLAYER!!

I'm callin you out bitch!

THIS streaming video (middle of page) is the only evidence I need to PROVE, 100%, without a shadow of a doubt, that humankind has not only benefited from streaming video, it has been blessed with streaming video!

[quivers with joy at sound defeat of deafplayer]
HA! That was some funny shit. "Show us your asha"
 

SellyCat

TRIBE Member
praktik said:
DEAFPLAYER!!

I'm callin you out bitch!

THIS streaming video (middle of page) is the only evidence I need to PROVE, 100%, without a shadow of a doubt, that humankind has not only benefited from streaming video, it has been blessed with streaming video!

[quivers with joy at sound defeat of deafplayer]
I'm afraid he is beyond reasoning with...he's a non-streaming fanatic. Militant to the core of his being against individual rights and freedom...to uh...have on-demand streaming video.

You can find a video of him on the internet where he's holding my Router hostage, tied up in front of a black flag with calligraphy binary code on it...he's wearing explosives and a black mask...after reading some insane computational intarweb rhetoric, he used a machete to slice the Router's LEDs off.

And, NO you can't stream the video....he's a maniac.
 

deafplayer

TRIBE Member
Ive seen that:)
Yes its hilarious..... I suppose streaming could be used for less than profoundly anti-human purposes

However, do you know where I first saw that video? At a friend's place, on his computer
on his HARD DRIVE god damnit!
securely stowed for repeated use at our convenience - truely 'on demand'

Have we become so wrapped up in our instant gratification-obsessed Western ways that we forget that we have hard disks for long-term storage? That we have more than just RAM??
What if my internet connection went down? What if its slow one day? - what if, like so many so-called "streams", the video is retardely slow and unreliable, the program being too stupid to simply calculate whether or not it is capable of showing you the movie without constant freezes, stuttering or pauses for supposed "buffering"?? What if I want to seek to some other spot, fast forward or skip back to the beginning or end? I'd have to wait, wouldnt I. Not so 'instant' now is it! What if I wanted something better than the typically ASS audiovisual quality afforded by highly compressed "streaming" content from sites that have to stream the thing to every person every time they want to watch it - even if they just downloaded the same data 10 minutes ago, it must be sent again, so naturally this is an enormous waste of bandwidth and hence the sites usually give you shit quality. Of course this is so that every user has to go back to the same fucking webpage and see the same torrent of irritatingly cheap and pathetic advertising from shady internet businesses every time (and often the whole time) they watch it
Isnt it possible that weve gone too far? surrendered too much of our humanity???

Do you know what happened to that friend with the hard drive? I haven't seen him in like 6 months
We've both been watching streaming internet content 16 hours a day, lost our jobs, dropped out of school. His infant daughter died of starvation when he forgot to feed her during a particularly long binge of floating aimlessly from one iFilm feature to another
Streaming is the new opium
 

SellyCat

TRIBE Member
deafplayer said:
Ive seen that:)
Yes its hilarious..... I suppose streaming could be used for less than profoundly anti-human purposes

However, do you know where I first saw that video? At a friend's place, on his computer
on his HARD DRIVE god damnit!
securely stowed for repeated use at our convenience - truely 'on demand'

Have we become so wrapped up in our instant gratification-obsessed Western ways that we forget that we have hard disks for long-term storage? That we have more than just RAM??
What if my internet connection went down? What if its slow one day? - what if, like so many so-called "streams", the video is retardely slow and unreliable, the program being too stupid to simply calculate whether or not it is capable of showing you the movie without constant freezes, stuttering or pauses for supposed "buffering"?? What if I want to seek to some other spot, fast forward or skip back to the beginning or end? I'd have to wait, wouldnt I. Not so 'instant' now is it! What if I wanted something better than the typically ASS audiovisual quality afforded by highly compressed "streaming" content from sites that have to stream the thing to every person every time they want to watch it - even if they just downloaded the same data 10 minutes ago, it must be sent again, so naturally this is an enormous waste of bandwidth and hence the sites usually give you shit quality. Of course this is so that every user has to go back to the same fucking webpage and see the same torrent of irritatingly cheap and pathetic advertising from shady internet businesses every time (and often the whole time) they watch it
Isnt it possible that weve gone too far? surrendered too much of our humanity???

Do you know what happened to that friend with the hard drive? I haven't seen him in like 6 months
We've both been watching streaming internet content 16 hours a day, lost our jobs, dropped out of school. His infant daughter died of starvation when he forgot to feed her during a particularly long binge of floating aimlessly from one iFilm feature to another
Streaming is the new opium
You're under arrest.

Prepare for extraordinary rendition. You will be purged of your incompatible veiws. I will....ahem....stream them out of you. Rendition.

You know, I love that term. Rendition. You render fat from bacon, and information from terrorists. God Bless America.
 
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