Lounging about casually this fine evening whilst enjoying a nice evening of movie watching and oreo consuming with my future roomate Nusty (as featured below), my hand gracefully grazed the back of my couch and stumbled upon THESE!
It seems as though the owner of this fine set of fake breasts has misplaced them behind the confines of my couch. We are in need of finding the owner as soon as possible, as the pair of breasts are getting unruly and out of hand.
First, we thought they would be fun to have around the house. We entertained ourselves with fake boob races on our balcony door for hours. But then the ketamine wore off.
Nusty, however, found more entertaining ways to handle the stray breasts. Note my requirement for all roomates to have overwhelming effeminate qualities.
As fun as things were, one of them tried to attack Greg.
This was when we knew the situation was serious. One of them scuttled off and convinced king soccer star David Beckham he needed to enhance his already perfectly sculpted chin.
The two later combined forces and prepared a sneak attack on the legendary Sean Connery.
"YOU'LL RUE THE DAY YOU CROSSHED ME!!" The fake tits took his Famous Titties comment a tad too seriously it seems.
In an even more sly and destructive attempt at fame and glory, the fake boobs tried to sneak their way onto our VERY OWN TRIBE 2002 CALANDER!! Our sharp eye and keen sense of fake boob detection spotted them immediately though, thank christ.
Needless to say, it has been a stressful ordeal and we are petitioning a mass search to FIND THE OWNER OF THESE FAKE TITS. IF YOU ARE THE OWNER, WILL YOU PLEASE CLAIM YOUR BELONGINGS. THEY HAVE NO PLACE IN THIS HOUSE OF FULL AND VOLOPTUOUS REAL BREASTS, THANK YOU.
We have temporarily dealt with the situation, but further request your assistance.
Thank you.
Tina, Greg and Dave.
It seems as though the owner of this fine set of fake breasts has misplaced them behind the confines of my couch. We are in need of finding the owner as soon as possible, as the pair of breasts are getting unruly and out of hand.
First, we thought they would be fun to have around the house. We entertained ourselves with fake boob races on our balcony door for hours. But then the ketamine wore off.
Nusty, however, found more entertaining ways to handle the stray breasts. Note my requirement for all roomates to have overwhelming effeminate qualities.
As fun as things were, one of them tried to attack Greg.
This was when we knew the situation was serious. One of them scuttled off and convinced king soccer star David Beckham he needed to enhance his already perfectly sculpted chin.
The two later combined forces and prepared a sneak attack on the legendary Sean Connery.
"YOU'LL RUE THE DAY YOU CROSSHED ME!!" The fake tits took his Famous Titties comment a tad too seriously it seems.
In an even more sly and destructive attempt at fame and glory, the fake boobs tried to sneak their way onto our VERY OWN TRIBE 2002 CALANDER!! Our sharp eye and keen sense of fake boob detection spotted them immediately though, thank christ.
Needless to say, it has been a stressful ordeal and we are petitioning a mass search to FIND THE OWNER OF THESE FAKE TITS. IF YOU ARE THE OWNER, WILL YOU PLEASE CLAIM YOUR BELONGINGS. THEY HAVE NO PLACE IN THIS HOUSE OF FULL AND VOLOPTUOUS REAL BREASTS, THANK YOU.
We have temporarily dealt with the situation, but further request your assistance.
Thank you.
Tina, Greg and Dave.
