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Discussion in 'TRIBE Main Forum' started by Pyrovitae, Mar 21, 2002.

  1. Pyrovitae

    Pyrovitae TRIBE Member

    so i dunno, tribe needs another controversial thread.;)

    i've been thinking for some reason about this topic a lot lately, and i'm curious to hear other's opinions on it. most of you are sexually active. i've always been pro-choice, an advocate for a woman's right to choose...especially in the circumstances of health issues, rape, or incest.

    i used to wholeheartedly believe that if ever got pregnant i would carry the baby to term and give it up for adoption. it was my initial decision, after all, that brought about its inception.

    now, at this stage in my life, i think i would probably consider abortion if that were to happen. i want to have children eventually, but considering my life right now is chaotic, along with various lifestyle choices, (smoking, occasional drinking, ze crack-rock,) i don't think it would be fair to my hypothetical child or myself to have it. selfish? perhaps.

    thoughts? opinions? religious right-wingers, leftist pro-choicers, men and women alike, whadda ya think?


    (it's frightening that even with taking all the necessary precautions, std's can be contracted and pregnancy can happen. for a moment of bliss, lives can be affected...both individuals involved as well as one yet unborn.)
  2. -Mercury-

    -Mercury- TRIBE Member

    Too many children are born into bad situations because abortion (or contraception, for that matter) is not an option. And I think that's awfull.
  3. terrawrist III

    terrawrist III TRIBE Member


    it was never an issue for me,I don't view it as a major issue like most others...and for me it's a no-brainer!

    however,if the woman chooses to have an abortion,she should really get it done as soon as possible to eleviate the trauma thats comes with ending a life as it's progressed to a certian state.

    but yeah, pro choice definetly
  4. Aphrodite

    Aphrodite TRIBE Member

    a friend of mine had been having sex since she was 12. she hated it, but it was something she did to cope being lonely. The one time she actually enjoyed it, and had an orgasm, the condom broke, her uterus contracted, sucking up his spern and impregnating her. poor thing.

    she had an abortion, but it was a slap in the face. she had become one step closer to feeling normal when BAM! she had to make a dicision like that by herself.

    abortion keeps children from having children, but... it's still a part of them and it will always hurt.

    I can just imagine what that baby would look like.

    shannon > pro-choice, but be prepared
  5. Chiclet

    Chiclet TRIBE Promoter

    It depends on the situation. For everything there is a happy medium.

    But when it comes down to it, I'm pro-choice.

    Pro-Life is still Pro-Choice.
  6. joey

    joey TRIBE Member

    i dont dig abortion...
    (unless it comes from forced sex)
  7. Silverback

    Silverback TRIBE Member

    ..... why?
  8. mystique0217

    mystique0217 TRIBE Member

    this is a difficult question.
    i guess my personal answer is: prochoice.

    But what I know is that:
    -if i get pregnant wt a partner i share my romantic aspect of love with, i will have the baby no matter what kind of circumstance i would be in.
    even such choice would make me become a single mother? you may ask..yes.
    cause almost everything that happens in my life, i do believe that they all happen for reasons, and as long as i am confident about trying to find the right solutions to adapt to whatever the situation that would be given to me, i would be fine..

    -i do not sleep with people that i can not give myself to fully so i do not put myself in a situation where i would need to abort a baby...
    also if i was ever raped, then i will go to the clinic and take the pills that would avoid myself from conceiving..

    but if this was to do with others, and if my friend got pregnant and she decided to abort a baby even it was with her most significant another, i would support her decision :)



    so overall, i feel i am safe

    so i think that before
  9. mystique0217

    mystique0217 TRIBE Member

    and something i forgot to mention..

    IF my significant another does not want us to have the baby for whatever the reasons, i would make a decision based on what i would value..either my partner..or our baby..

    i personally just have a concern that i do not have a body to be able to conceive any of my personal off springs..so if i got pregnant, i would want to treat it as such a special gift, and i want to keep him/her even i would need to work so hard to support her/him on my own.

  10. sentence

    sentence TRIBE Promoter

    one vote right here for pro choice.
  11. Aphrodite

    Aphrodite TRIBE Member

    I don't get it again.. there's something lost in the translation! no offence Kumy :)
  12. joey

    joey TRIBE Member

    well, i would rahter not use this saying cause its ghetto....


    dont do the crime, if you cant do the time..

    if your not prepared to have a kid, then dont be having sex, or at least use the right birth control
  13. PosTMOd

    PosTMOd Well-Known TRIBEr

    The pills actually abort what's already been conceived, technically...

    Life... define that... good luck! I could argue that a baby isn't really LIVING until around the six month after birth...

    Of course, people who know dangerously little *cough*IgnorantReligiousFreaks*cough* decide that life begins at conception... a ludicrous concept for anyone with a modicum of knowledge...
  14. Pyrovitae

    Pyrovitae TRIBE Member

    ya, but what if you *are* practicing safe sex, and that minimal chance of your birth control failing happens. it's against the odds, and kinda like winning the baby lottery.

    i can see your perspective...i can see both sides in this, totally.

    it's amazing that abortion is still worldwide the most commonly used method of contraception.

    and ya kumi, can you clarify a l'il bit? :) it sounds like it your signif. othah wanted you to give up the child you would.

    ~N <-----*always* practices safe sex, still scared that it could happen
  15. mystique0217

    mystique0217 TRIBE Member

    i try to explain where i come from.

    IF my partner does not want me to have a baby just cause he does not want to deal with the whole thing..

    -then that's fine. i will dump such a loser and have the baby.
    cause i choose my baby and not my partner.

    IF my partner can not have the baby for whatever other reasons..such as financial factor etc, and respecting his opinion could make us to have a stronger relationship, then i would choose my partner..and give up my baby..
    even getting an abortion mean that i am risking my chance of getting infertile compeletely or whatever in the future.
    (i would need to be sure that this person would be someone that i am going to share my lifetime with and also he is understanding of the fact that we might have to adopt a baby in the future by making such a decision as abortion).<-cause i am risking my own body..

    i personally donot think that i can have a baby that easily..so i just can not give up my chance of having a baby..if you know what i mean..

    i am glad that i am a girl, and i love babies.. and i WANT my OWN babies in the future.. i will do anything for my baby(ies).

    that's just my opinion.

    Last edited: Mar 21, 2002
  16. redeyes

    redeyes TRIBE Member

    i agree with you 100% but for different reasons. i believe that adoption is the way to go. i know a nice loving couple that is having problems adopting and it breaks your heart because you can see how good parents they can be. this is a very touchy subject.

  17. mystique0217

    mystique0217 TRIBE Member

    true true..
    but hey, timo, not all the people who believes that life begins at conception are the religious thinker!

    keep that in your mind :)
  18. Chiclet

    Chiclet TRIBE Promoter

    Emergency Contraceptive Pill within 72 hours.

    And there is no such thing as safe sex unless it's cyber or phone sex. Only safer sex.

    I don't agree with using abortion as a form of contraception. There are many other more practical methods of contraception.
  19. Pyrovitae

    Pyrovitae TRIBE Member

    true enough.

    neither do i. but it is a statistic, as well as a fact. especially in developing/underdeveloped nations which don't have access to the pill, condoms, etc. or have a religion stipulating against their use.

    human beings, along with dolphins and bonobo's are the only animals on this planet that procreate purely for pleasure.

  20. rejenerate

    rejenerate TRIBE Member

    Definitely pro-choice.

    When I was younger (12/13), I was anti-abortion. My family's not religious, but I believed it was murder. I even got really upset when I found out my parents had donated money to the Morgentaler clinic.

    Then at 17 I had sex for the first time...protected, and it didn't last long (I'm quite sure there was no climax for him). Then my period was late and I freaked. I think it was just from stress, 'cause it came and I was so relieved. And then I went on the Pill.

    I take precautions to -not- get pregnant...I'm on Depo Provera, and I insist on condoms unless it's a monogamous relationship and tests have been done, etc. But, should something happen, whether it be rape, failure of birth control or just plain carelessness/forgetfulness, I don't think anyone has a right to say that I -have- to have a child I don't want. I don't know if I'll
    -ever- want children, especially right now at age 25 when I still haven't really decided on a career path yet. I'm not a responsible, independent person, yet, and so far my sex partners haven't always been, either. I did use the morning-after pill once, though I think I was fine...just a little paranoid.

    I know adoption is an option, and I would consider it, but I don't want to be a vessel for a baby for 9 months if I'm not going to keep it. And I just couldn't imagine the agony of giving up a baby. I know in my case my baby would probably be fine...I'm white, and my sex partners have all been white/of European background. Those babies are the -wanted- ones. But unfortunately it's not the case for other races. Rosie O'Donnell says that in Florida young black boys are the majority of unadopted children. Is it better that these children languish in foster/group care during their developing years? I don't think so.

    I wouldn't necessarily choose an abortion if I were to find myself pregnant...but it's good to know I have that (safe) option. I can't even imagine how agonizing a decision it would be, but I know that I do believe people shouldn't have kids unless they're fully prepared - mentally, emotionally and financially. I know a few women who have had abortions who definitely were not in that position, and they made the choice they thought was best for them. And to me, it's what the woman wants that matters. It's her body, her life.

  21. PosTMOd

    PosTMOd Well-Known TRIBEr

    Naw, but they sure have one similarity: they both have wacked out beliefs.
  22. Rosey

    Rosey TRIBE Member

    i'm pro-choice as an ethical thing. like somebody said above, i don't believe a fetus is anymore alive than a piece of hair or a toenail until several months into the pregnancy.

    however, i would rather that people were never in a situation where they had to consider an abortion. it's to hard on the people involved, especially the woman, to deal with mentally.

  23. DJAlchemy

    DJAlchemy TRIBE Promoter


    I think it should be used as an emergency procedure, and nothing more.

    Peace & love. D
  24. aether

    aether TRIBE Member

    I'm pro-choice as well. It is up to the woman in my opinion. Her body, her choice.

    As far as a couple of the arguments go.. 'Don't do the crime if you don't want to pay the time'. I think taking responsibility for your actions is extremely important. However, we live life by taking precautions to keep us safe. Every now and then accidents happen, and when they do we have to deal with the results. Very rarely do we resign ourselves, we try to change things for the best possible outcome. This often means making tough choices. I don't agree with removing the possibility of making those tough choices.

    I don't think many people see abortion as a 'method of birth control'. It's not a pleasant process at all from either a psychological or physical standpoint. Even the 'morning after' pill is far from pleasant. What I think is unfortunate in less-developed countries is that they don't have access to better birth-control choices.

    What it comes down to is that a woman should have the ability to actually make the choice should she be faced with the situation. Removing that choice, or setting arbitrary limits on who can make that choice denies women the right to govern their own selves.
  25. Gavin the Bass

    Gavin the Bass TRIBE Member

    if a person cannot, by circumstance, raise a child to the best of their ability to give that child the best possible life, then why give that child a life at all?
    its better if a kid has a fair chance when its born instead of being born into a situation thats not ready to maintain it economically, mentally or emotionally. if the mother isn't prepared to raise the child, she shouldn't go through with giving birth.

    but still, having to go through with an abortion would probably be for me the single most troubling time in my life, and i do feel for women who do go through with it. i've had to deal with the emotional consequences that are lingering with my girlfriend a year after she had an abortion (not my doing, a mess-up from the past, but to see it affect her is gut-wrenching). this is a bit personal, but she feels as if shes a coward for not having the courage enough to actually have the kid, even if she couldn't raise it. and i view the situation completely differently, that shes not a coward because she had the courage enough to realise that it would be impossible for her to raise the child to the best of her abilities, and a life of uncertainty is no real life for a child...

    but try telling that to someone whos actually had an abortion.

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