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Old 02-06-2002, 02:30 PM   #76
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<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by janiecakes:
sex is supposed to be whatever the people who are involved in it want it to be. </font>
For sure.
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Old 02-06-2002, 02:30 PM   #77
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do you still experience physical attraction to other people?
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Old 02-06-2002, 02:35 PM   #78
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<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by 416:
All I'm saying is that my urge toward monogamy is as real to me is as your urge toward polyamoury (now I'm making words up) is to you. </font>
but you can still be in a monogamous relationship and be attracted to other people. you just don't act on it, right?

she's not saying monogamy is unnatural, she's saying that pretending you only find one person in the entire world hot is.
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Old 02-06-2002, 02:39 PM   #79
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No. That's what I was trying to explain, dip-shit. Now give you head a shake, realize that I'm not making any generalizations about how other people should think or feel, because I'm bright enaugh to know that I don't know shit about that.

The feelings I get from being with "the right woman" completely overpower any sexual desires I might have for someone else. It makes the thought of being with someone else seem completely absurd.

Seeing a nice set of boobies and appreciating them for asthetic value is different from sexual attraction to me. Thus the whole shpeal about sex and emotion being linked... blah blah blah...

In my mind, if I saw a girl that I actually wanted to stick my dick in other then my girl, then I probably shouldn't be in a monogomous relationship with that girl.
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Old 02-06-2002, 02:40 PM   #80
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yeah, i don't get that.

*poos on 416*
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Old 02-06-2002, 02:49 PM   #81
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<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by janiecakes:
yeah, i don't get that.

*poos on 416*
</font>
That's because you lack empathy.

Don't worry, it'll come as you mature.

har har har.

j/k, assface.
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Old 02-06-2002, 02:52 PM   #82
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BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.

i'm going to tell your monogamous girlfriend that you like panking drag queens. cause you do.
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Old 02-06-2002, 02:56 PM   #83
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Yawn.

Good one.

Kid.
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Old 02-06-2002, 03:13 PM   #84
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i'm older than you, skeez.
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Old 02-06-2002, 03:22 PM   #85
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<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by 416:
You go ahead and pank the pope for all I care. Talk about it on message boards, start a mailing list and a 1960's style hippy commune if it tickles your fancy. All I'm saying is that my urge toward monogamy is as real to me is as your urge toward polyamoury (now I'm making words up) is to you. It's got nothing to do with natural or unnatural.</font>
You're not really making words up, just mispelling them. The word is 'polyamory', and if anyone feels the need for soem help witht he issue, there's a Group:

"The Ethical Lover Group is a polyamory/non-monogamy discussion group. Open to all genders, orientations and gender identities. Meetings on the second Wednesday of the month, 7:30pm to 10:00pm at the University of Toronto Women's Centre, 563 Spadina in Toronto."

Aphrodite: Yes, we do have a lot in common... It's a good thing I'm not looking for any non-monogamy converts! You too, Janiecakes! BTW, are you an 416 enemies or friends... it's hard to tell...

D.

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Old 02-06-2002, 03:25 PM   #86
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<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by janiecakes:
sex is supposed to be whatever the people who are involved in it want it to be. </font>
k yay..i guess i was thinking more of a traditional thing. all i know is i would be highly uncomfortable with my boyfriend having sex with another guy...

Pete-totally, and its cool that there can be that much openess in someones relationship, i just doubt i'd be comfortable with it.

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Old 02-06-2002, 03:42 PM   #87
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[quote]<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by Lysistrata:
[b] You're not really making words up, just mispelling them. The word is 'polyamory'
[B]
[Quote]

LoL. Thanks.

Quote:

You too, Janiecakes! BTW, are you an 416 enemies or friends... it's hard to tell...

</font>
I consider us friends, but lately I can't tell either.

Jane has been making sexual advances towards me, spoutting her polyamory (boya!) rhetoric all the while. When I rebuff her, she comes onto this board and says nasty things to me.

Is there some kind of a support/discussion group you could suggest for polyamorous-women-scorned? I think Jane might be interested in that.

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Old 02-06-2002, 03:52 PM   #88
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<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by Lysistrata:
BTW, are you an 416 enemies or friends... it's hard to tell...
</font>
we're friends, unfortunately.

it's funny, i get asked that on a monthly basis on this msg board.
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Old 02-06-2002, 03:59 PM   #89
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IMO, or for me... I don't like to share.
One person at a time is enough for me...
Plus I'm an emotional person, so I'd be afraid [despite if they say they wouldn't be] to hurt that person I'm in a relationship with.

Mind you, I like watching..hehe

XXX
Marian
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Old 02-06-2002, 04:03 PM   #90
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<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by 416:
The feelings I get from being with "the right woman" completely overpower any sexual desires I might have for someone else. It makes the thought of being with someone else seem completely absurd.
</font>
That's such a load of poopoo.

I am with a girl, and convinced that the diversity and intensity of our attraction will not be matched by anyone. In a practical sense, we're Mr. and Mrs. Right.

But to say that I am not attracted to other women is a so wrong, in my case. I have my thing with Tina, and that's that. But that doesn't mean that other people are suddenly not attractive. And if our comfort allows, we can explore our sexuality/relationships outside our 2-people unit.

The artificial confines of emotional comfort can be stretched, as long as there is communication involved and both parties are interested in the changes they want to make to their relationship. You have to remember, people (most, not all) are mentaly and emotionally plastic. If people want to change something about themselves (ie. emotional response), they will.
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Old 02-06-2002, 04:17 PM   #91
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<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by t-boy:
That's such a load of poopoo.

</font>
No it's not.
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Old 02-06-2002, 04:28 PM   #92
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<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by 416:
No it's not.</font>
Yes it is times infinity.

I win
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Old 02-06-2002, 05:28 PM   #93
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<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">
Idealy you should feel comfortable enough in a relationship that you're not worried that a little harmless experimenting and sexual fun isn't going to tear you apart. Actually... ideally you should be able to talk about it with your partner, be able to express your feelings and take it from there.

Pete[/B]</font>
exactly!

pete, you so smart!

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Old 02-06-2002, 05:36 PM   #94
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<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by *TheLiquidFairy*:
IMO, or for me... I don't like to share.
One person at a time is enough for me...
Plus I'm an emotional person, so I'd be afraid [despite if they say they wouldn't be] to hurt that person I'm in a relationship with.

Mind you, I like watching..hehe

XXX
Marian
</font>

Actually, in my experience, the couple gets less hurt than the third-wheel girl... But that could be because I've only ever been the third-wheel girl. In a couple of the situations I've been in, it's arisen at least partially out of having a crush on the girl in the couple. We all fool around, it's fun, but it really only exacerbates the crush, and once the hangover wears off, she's still just a straight girl who likes to play around.

D.
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Old 02-06-2002, 05:38 PM   #95
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unless the girl in the couple ain't straight.
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Old 02-06-2002, 06:19 PM   #96
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<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by janiecakes:
unless the girl in the couple ain't straight.</font>
Sure, that could happen, it just never did. Then there's that to deal with, like, if the girl would rather be with you then the boy, is he going ot dump him, and then that's sad for the boy, or if not, then it's sad for you, unless all three of you start attending the polyamory group... Sure, it's complex, but all matters of the heart are.

D.
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Old 02-06-2002, 06:23 PM   #97
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<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by Lysistrata:
she's still just a straight girl who likes to play around.

</font>
well said.

WELL SAID

narissa

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Old 02-06-2002, 08:56 PM   #98
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<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by janiecakes:
we're friends, unfortunately.

it's funny, i get asked that on a monthly basis on this msg board.
</font>
janie, you seem to fight with everyone you know on here. lots of people assume that you hate other people on the board (ie: myself and basic). i guess they just don't understand how much you like to fight.

CC
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Old 02-06-2002, 10:34 PM   #99
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<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by Lysistrata:
You talk very very disregardingly about other people's fantasies, which kinda isn't nice. Just because a threesome is not exactly the ultimate in naughty forbidden thrills for some of us, doesn't mean that it shouldn't be for others. Some people just are vanilla--and that makes being more than that more fun in comparison, right? But silent comparison--there's no need to make people feel bad.
</font>
My apologies. I generally try to put some forethought into my posts, but last night I was aiming for the quick and dirty -no pun intended. I was hoping that prefacing my comment with the word "personally" would make it clear that I was speaking for myself only. If it was not clear. . .my bad. I like to eat peanut butter and pickle sandwiches, so I'm in no position to speak for anyone else's tastes, just wanted to put my 2 cents into the topic at hand.

If I might elucidate my previous post, I refer specifically to those fantasies that portray the women involved as mere chattel (going back to PostMod's post on the first page) -objects as opposed to subjects in the action. My colourful description was intended to imply that meaning, and was not a statement about my private life, or any practices or fantasies therein (i.e. I was not saying that such things are just not kinky enough for me, I was saying that a particular mindset behind a particular act really puts me off). I hope that clears things up.

And with my original meaning clarified, I have no qualms about speaking disparagingly about it.
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Old 02-07-2002, 03:04 AM   #100
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<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by *TheLiquidFairy*:
IMO, or for me... I don't like to share.
One person at a time is enough for me...
Plus I'm an emotional person, so I'd be afraid [despite if they say they wouldn't be] to hurt that person I'm in a relationship with.

Mind you, I like watching..hehe

XXX
Marian
</font>
I agree with you 100 percent!! (I like to watch too ) One person is totally enough for me as well. Especially when I REALLY like the person that I'm dating, I don't care to even look at or desire someone else.
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